Je T'Aime
by Stephif
Summary: **Spoliers. After Shadow kissed*** Rose leaves the Academy to kill Dimitri. Can she do it? And if she does, can she ever really get over him? Will she honor her promise to Adrian? The story is better than the summary, trust me. Rated T to be safe.
1. Préface

**PREFACE**

"The neighbors said she moved away  
Funny how it rained all day  
I didn't think much of it then  
But it's starting to all make sense  
Oh, I can see now that all of these clouds  
Are following me in my desperate endeavor  
To find my whoever, where ever she may be."

_**-**__All Time Low_

It was hideously ironic, the way my heart seemed to have ripped in half, as soon it finally felt whole.

I knew I reacted on impulse when I left the academy, but I needed to save Dimitri. I needed to stop him from becoming a monster.

Dimitri… Dimitri… Dimitri…

It was wrong for him to become strigori. It was wrong for him to be a bloodthirsty monster.

And, even at the cost of my own life, I would save him.

I would save him because I loved him. Dimitri, who my mentor. Dimitri, who was seven years older than me. Dimitri, who was also suppose to be Lissa's guardian. I knew the score, I knew it was wrong to have fallen so deeply head over heels in love; but you just cant control who you fall in love with. Fate has its own plan. And, by some miricle, Dimitri loved me to. At first, we ignored the attraction between us, but soon it became to much to deny. Dimitri decided to resign as Lissa's guardian so we could be together.  
That day, our school was ambushed by a group of Strigori. Strigori were the undead vampires. There were Strigori, Morori, and Dhampirs. Morori are born; Strigori are made. Morori suck the blood off willing humans, but never drained them entirely; Strigori took any blood, and always killed their food. Morori could use magic; Strigori were super fast and super strong. Morori could die of old age; Strigori were the undead. Dhampirs protected the Morori from the strigori. We were considered their guardians.

Anyways, we killed most of the Strigori, but some got away… with prisoners.

Strigori were known to take away Morori and Dhampirs, they used them as a snack, or sometimes to further their race.

Usually, the guardians never looked for the hostages. They named it to big of a risk; but I couldn't let the strigori get away with all those novices and Morori. So, I convinced the school guardians to help the hostages escape.  
That's were I lost Dimitri.

We were doing so well at first. Thanks to my shadow-kissed abilities (I'll explain more about _that_ later) I had a very reliable way of knowing when strigori were near me. I could _feel _them. So we took out a lot. But there were more than we bargained for. In the end, we helped all the hostages escape, but I had to watch as Dimitri was tackled to the ground, and bitten by the blonde vampire who wanted to finish out the Dragomir line. (Lissa Dragomir was the last surviving Dragomir in existence. You could say it's a very large title to live up to; The Dragomirs were a vary popular, and very powerful family. Up until Lissa's mom, dad, and brother Andre died in a car crash. I was there. The car crash should've killed me to. But Lissa has a very rare magic ability unlike most of the Morori. Lissa had spirit. She could bring things back to life and heal people. We found this out much, much later; but Lissa revived me. That's how I'm shadow-kissed. Because I died, I have a certain carefree, reckless life because somewhere in me knows I should have died. I have can also communicate with ghosts. Weird, huh?

Here is the sick part: Not all Strigori all changed by force. Some, like Christian Ozera's parents, were changed at their own free will. To do so, you have to be a Morori who completely drains the blood out of someone else. This is called "awakening" because when your done, you're a strigori. Easy right? Well, it is if you don't have a problem taking someones life just for your own selfish reasons. Immortality, however, is a very motivational reason in some selfish eyes.

When you become strigori, you loose all reasonable thinking; everything and everyone you ever cared about doesn't matter. All you care about, all you need is blood. And you want it at any cost. That's why Dimitri told me that, if it were to happen to him, he hoped someone would destroy him. There were only three ways to destroy a strigori: fire, decapitation, and with a silver stake through the heart. I had my stake, and I was ready.

**A/N: Hey guys, sorry for all the boring background stuff, but its pretty necessary. Anyways, for those of you who were wondering, the title "Je T'aime" is French for "I love You." Pretty cool, eh? I thought it sounded better & more interesting. **


	2. Réveillezvous!

**Chapter One:**

"_The look on your face could light up a room  
But instead you left. And now I'm sitting with my head on the dashboard  
Push the seat back and close my eyes  
I had this dream that I was on an airplane  
afraid to fly"_

_-Rocket to the moon._

I didn't remember falling asleep, but I didn't doubt that I was dreaming. I was standing on the beach, wearing nothing but an itty-bitty black bikini top and a pair of blue, denim shorts.

Hearing someone call, "little Dhampir," was how I knew I was dreaming. I looked to the left, and I saw Adrian Ivashkov making his way over to were I was sitting in the sand. We were surprised to find out Adrian was a spirit user to; Lissa was ecstatic. She thought that she was a freak for a very long time.

"Hey," I said, contently. "How's everything back at St. Vlad's?" I asked indifferently.

"Every things fine," he answered. "Lissa's devastated." Guilt flooded through me. She never quite found out my feelings for Dimitri until the end, and when I was leaving, she tried to stop me. We both said some really mean things to each other, and I've regretted it ever since. But Lissa couldn't visit dreams like Adrian could, so I never got the chance to apologize.

"She thinks I love Dimitri more than her," I said without thinking. I looked down at the ground, avoding his eyes.

Adrian cupped his hands under my chin and lifted my face up to be on eye level with him.

"No," Adrian contradicted. "She would've said anything to make you stay." I felt awkward for a moment. I recently found out that Adrian was in love with me. I felt bad that I couldn't return his feelings.

"I don't know," I mumbled. "She sounded like she meant it." We sat there in the sand in silence until Adrian jumped to his feet. He reached his hand out for me to take it. I stared at it, unsure of what to do.  
"I wanna show you something," He smiled, reaching his hand down a bit farther. Defeated, I took it.

He led me to the woods, which I didn't even know was there. Beyond there, was a beautiful meadow. There was crystal clear water, flowers blossoming everywhere you looked, and trees as high as the eye could see. "Wow." Was all I could say. Adrian smiled a truly triumphant smile at me before pulling his shirt off and throwing it to the ground. Bare chested, he jumped into the lake. Once he managed to pull his head over the water, he gestured for me to join him. _Why not?_ Said a voice in my head, _I'm already wearing a bathing suit._  
So, without thinking, I jumped into the lake. The water was cold, but not freezing. The sand at the bottom was warm, but not hot. It was perfect. Then again it was, of course, a dream. I swam over to Adrian's side and threw him a grin; he smiled back, apparently happy that he could still make me smile. "So," he began, swimming closer. "How are you feeling?" He meant to sound casual but I could detect real curiosity in his voice.

"Honestly? Not very good. I still can't believe he's gone." My voice broke on the last word, and I cursed myself. "I always thought he was invincible. But I guess…"

"He's not," Adrian said flatly. He never really liked Dimitri; especially since I was so in love with him.

"I'm sorry," I said sincerely, "I know you don't wanna hear this."

"No, I always wanna know what your thinking Rose," he said. "I just wish you weren't thinking certain things."

I rolled my eyes. "Oh, is that all?" I asked sarcastically.

"Rose, you know what I mean," he said, playfully shoving my shoulder.

"Do I?"I asked playfully. It was so easy to be with Adrian, which made me feel a little guilty. I didn't want to lead him on.

"You should," He smiled. We talked on for a few hours, catching up on things and just messing around.

After an hour or two, the world started to shake. The figures and colors went in and out of focus, and if I were awake, I would have thought I was passing out or dying.

"What's happening?" I asked, anxiety showering my voice.

"Your waking up," he sounded as confused as I felt. "Rose, are you alone?"  
Apparently, I wasn't.

**Adrian's P.O.V **

Why couldn't Rose and Lissa's bond work both ways? It was so accommodating for Rose to know what was going on in Lissa's world, but it would be at least another twelve hours before I found out what caused Rose to wake up. I didn't know why, but this unknown mystery kinda makes me feel a little queasy.

There was some unsaid agreement that made the library our place to hang out. When I walked in, I saw Christian and Lissa sitting side by side and Eddie across from them at on of the library tables.

"Hey Adrian," Lissa smiled. "What's new?"

"I talked to Rose last night," I said. I saw Christian stiffen, and glance at Lissa. Rose and Christian always bickered, but I knew that they loved each other like brother and sister. "She's worried about _you _Lissa."  
Lissa laughed without humor, "Sure," she said. "She goes off by herself to kill god only knows how many strigori, and she worries about _me._" Sarcasm dripped from her every word. I hopped Rose wasn't listening. Lissa has changed a lot lately. Without all the funky details, I'll just say that she's a lot more like Christian when it comes to dark humor.

"Lissa," Christian said softly, at an attempt to calm her. "Rose will be okay. You didn't see how many strigori her and I took out when they invaded the academy. She'll be fine." But his voice suggested a hidden uncertainty.

"HOW??" Lissa all but screamed, her voice leaning toward hysterics. "Why did she have to leave? She doesn't need to be the one to hunt down Dimitri? I mean I get that… there was more to their relationship than just mentor and student but… it doesn't have to be her." Her voice grew small, "What if she doesn't come back?"

"She will," Eddie said. For a moment, I had forgotten he was even here. "She was great in Spokane, you just need to have a little faith in her." Lissa sighed. I could tell she still wasn't entirely convinced, but she didn't wanna argue it anymore.

"Lissa," Christian cooed, obviously aware of her unchanged attitude. "Rose knows what she's doing. She'll be back with us before you know it, I promise." She looked into his eyes, and I could see how she desperately wanted to believe him; so did I.

"I hope so," was all she could say. We sat in silence, turning through books and studding for our final exams before the librarian shooed us out. I walked off in the opposite direction of my suite, and Lissa looked at me with confused eyes.  
"Don't worry," I said. "I'm just in the mood for a little late night snack." She nodded her head, smiled, and walked away. It was a lie, but I didn't want to get her hopes up if I couldn't carry out what I planned. When I knew she wasn't looking, I turned left and exited the building. Hope started to bubble in my chest when I saw the church came into view. The lights inside were still on, so I suspected the priest was still there. I wasn't very familiar with the church, or its staff, but I knew enough to know that the man that greeted me was new.  
"Mr. Ivashkov, what a pleasant surprise," he smiled warmly. I offered him a smile in return, but it felt more like a grimace. "Please, come in. Sit down. Is there anything I can help you with?"

"Yeah, as a matter of fact, there is." I answered, eyeing the books at the far back of the church. "Is there anything over there about St. Vladimir?" I asked.  
"Yes, very many of them have to do with St. Vladimir," his smile grew larger. "Is there anything you'd prefer?"

"Yes," I answered, feeling my smile grow in response. "There is."

Rose's P.O.V

I fell to the floor from the violence from with the stranger shook me.  
"What is your problem?" I glared. "I was sleeping."  
"Really?" She asked, sarcastically. "I couldn't tell. Now get in the car, the sun should be setting soon."  
"Why does it matter if the sun's setting soon?" I asked. Of course _I_ knew the answer, but I doubted this human would know of the Strigori.  
She looked at me as if I was missing something very obvious. "Fine, stay here. But know that in the next thirty minutes you'll be dead… or worse." Okay, she knew of Strigori. I ran to the passenger seat and climbed in; I didn't even her get in the seat beside me, but soon we were speeding down the road.

"Who are you?" I asked, trying to sound indifferent.

"Guardian Sharpe," She answered. My face still looked confused, so she elaborated, "I'm a friend of your mothers." Oh, that made sense.

"What, is she having my followed?" I asked sarcastically.

"Actually, that's exactly what she's doing. She got a call from the academy after you dropped out. She didn't want you getting into trouble, but she could hardly leave her Morori to come and baby sit you. So I volunteered."  
"How thoughtful of her," I replied bitterly. "Doesn't she know that I can take care of myself by now?"

"Of course, but it's a big world," She said. "And lets face it, you are no match for a coven of Strigori."  
"I've killed plenty of Strigori," I contradicted.

"Yes, I know of your achievements," she said, as if bored. "But that has nothing to do with anything. You are still a novice and you are no match for even half a dozen strigori while your alone." We sat in silence, she was watching something on her palm pilot while still exceeding one hundred and twenty miles an hour, and I was sulking.  
I didn't understand why everybody was so intent to consider me such a baby. I proved myself able to handle strigori. I'm sure I could've handled things alone. _But, _said a small, reasoning voice in my head, _If it hadn't been fore Guardian Sharpe, I'd be easy prey for the strigori by now. _The sun was barely covering the horizon now, it would be safe for the strigori to come out soon, which lead me to ask,

"Where are we going?"

"The first place we can find, I'm afraid," she said sadly. "We cant afford to be picky while in these conditions."  
"How did you find me?"

"I didn't expect it to be so easy," she laughed. "They told me that you were one of the most skilled novices the academy has ever seen. But you stayed on an easy trail. At first I didn't think it was you, you cant imagine my surprise. I expected it to be days, but it only took hours. And I'm not complimenting you, you were stupid."

I held my tongue as a hundred comments flooded into my head, none of which were nice. _Who was _she_ to comment on _my_ intellect? _Instead, I glared out to the main road in front of us, forgetting and no longer caring about continuing any more conversation.

**A/N: Hey guys, I just wanted to thank you for reading my story (and for the couple who have, reviewing (: ) I just wanted to say I haven't previewed the chapter yet, so if you find a mistake, doesn't hesitate to say so. Reviews are better than seeing Adrian in a bathing suit. (:**


	3. Mon Evasion Douce

**Chapter Three:**

Well if you wanted honesty,

that's all you had to say.  
I never want to let you down or have you go,

it's better off this way.

_-My Chemical Romance_

**A/N: hey guys, this chapters a little longer than my others, but I also spent most of the day writing. (My shoulders are killing me.) But I wanted to get enough up here to entertain you guys for awhile, cuz I don't know how much more I'll be able to do after Independence Day because I'll be in Panama City for a month. I'll try to get up a few more chapters, but I'm working on a deadline here, so don't eat my head off. Continue reading & reviewing. I cannot tell you how happy I get even if you leave me the little-ist of reviews. Every review feels like a hug from a friend, so keep it coming. I hope you like this chapter.**

Rose's P.O.V

Adrian must've been busy, because he didn't visit my dreams that night. Instead, my mind wandered to my life back at the academy. Scenarios formed inside my head, while I pondered how my life would be like if I never dropped out. I'd become Lissa's guardian in the fall, something we've been planning since we were kids; I wouldn't be facing any immediate danger, St. Vladimir's had the most guardians roaming around the place, besides the royal court; and maybe… just maybe, I could learn to love Adrian. I'd never given him any thought before, I'd always suspected that his flirting was just for fun, but now that I know that he really did love me, it all seemed so obvious.  
But I knew that staying at the academy was never an option since I found out what Dimitri became. Even before I was fully conscious of my decision, it was already made. It would be tough, I'd only ever won one fight against Dimitri, and even then he wasn't trying to kill me. He knew all my moves, because he taught me them; he knew all my weaknesses, because I showed him them. It was ironic how the last two guys I ever loved were murdered. (Or in Dimitri's case, worse.)

"Good Morning, sleeping beauty," came a voice from the doorway. I opened my eyes and saw Guardian Sharpe, looking amused. I never noticed how much prettier than me she was. She had light white blonde hair that hung a couple inches above her waist and a pair of sapphire blue eyes. She was slender, but her shirt hinted at well-toned abs.  
"So can I leave now?" I asked. I needed to do what I left the academy for, and she was **not** going with me.

"Of course not," she said, sounding outraged at my request. "Didn't I tell you that your mother wanted me to look after you?!"  
"I'm eighteen!" I said, raising my voice a little. "I'm old enough to look after myself." Again, Guardian Sharpe looked bored, which only irritated me even further. "What makes you think your so much better than I am?"

"Years of experience." She answered, glaring at me. I let out a shout of outrage and stamped my foot. I knew I was acting childish, but I was just so… angry. Who did she think she was? I ran out of the room, and I was vaguely aware that she was following me. It was daylight, so there wouldn't be any strigori out, and she could physically make move with so many witnesses around… could she?  
I took a left out of the hotel and onto the freeway, careful to keep my eyes on the road ahead me, rather than the guardian behind me. As soon as I thought I'd gotten far enough away from the hotel so that she couldn't easily reach her own car, I stuck out my thumb. I was on a busy road, which was very accommodating when your trying to ditch a persistent follower. After a couple minutes, an orange 2007 Chevrolet Cobalt pulled over. A man somewhere In his mid-twenties, with a kindred face was driving and he rolled down the passengers seat window.

"You need a ride?" He asked. I nodded and climbed into the passengers seat.

Now, how many times have your parents told you not to take rides from strangers? Well, I've never been taught that rule because mine were never around; but I wasn't afraid, I knew I could handle some human boy. I was faster and stronger and had _way_ better reflexes, and if it meant exposing myself as a Dhampir… well hey, he wouldn't live long enough to tell anyone.

"So, are ya heading any place in particular?" He asked conversationally.  
"Depends, were are you heading?" I asked, I wanted to get as far away as possible.

"Well, I was kinda thinking Newport Beach. A buddy of mine is into hardware engineering and he rekons he can get me a job." He answered. _Well, _I thought, _that was far enough. _Worse comes to worse, I could just get a ride from someone in Newport Beach.

"Well," I answered casually, "I guess I'm heading to Newport Beach." I smiled at him, and he returned it with a smile of his own. It would be almost twenty-three hours to get from Texas to California, I only hopped this man didn't believe in filling every silence with conversation; even after nine hours of sleep, I was exhausted.

Adrian's P.O.V

The church had a larger library than I expected, and I ended up leaving with more than a couple books. I couldn't imagine how I must've looked to any bystanders. _Adrian Ivashkov caught reading_. More importantly, _Adrian Ivashkov _caring_ about something, _I thought bitterly. I made my way back to my room, however difficult with the thirty pounds of books stacked in my hands. Sometimes, I would think it would've been better to have specialized in wind, so I could make the books fly instead of carrying them. Then again, if I was a wind user, I wouldn't _need _these books, and I wouldn't know anybody who would.

Back in my own room, I could think clearly. I wasn't drinking tonight, I needed to be in contact with my spirit, not have it stifled by alcohol and clove cigarettes. I laughed for a moment, thinking about what Rose would say if she knew.

I opened the first book named: _St. Vladimir and his most breath-taking achievements. _

It had one hundred of his most accomplished achievements.

I spent maybe fifteen minutes, before I found all the proof I needed.

_43: And a witness from Harrah, WA, reports: "St. Vladimir was a creation above all others. I vividly remember some of his greatest achievements. I was twelve when I first had the honor of meeting him, and he surprised me to no end. We were sitting across from each other at a poker table, and he could tell me every thing I was thinking, as if it were printed on my forehead and he was merely reading the context…." "Some would call it mind reading… but I knew it was merely god blessing him with insight in others." _Okay, so maybe it wasn't a blessing from god, but it was definitely something; it was spirit. I suspected that spirit users could read the minds of others, now I only needed to test my theory, and see how far away is to far. I decided to tell Lissa tomorrow, she would want to know; but for now, I wanted to sleep.

More than anything I could have hoped for, I could sense Rose's presence. I knew that she too, was asleep. It was the beach again, how typical. I loved the beach more than any other place imaginable, but because of the Morori limitations, I couldn't ever go, except for a dream. Rose was sitting in the sand again, idly playing with a strand of hair. She was wearing a red tank top and a pair of black denim shorts. Her long dark hair was slung down her black, and her eyes were focused somewhere far away.  
"Hey," I said as I sat down beside her.  
She smiled at me when she answered, "Hey Adrian."

My answering smile was dazzling. "What happened the other day?" I asked, before I could forget.

"Oh, yeah. My mom sent someone to baby-sit me," she rolled her eyes. I could tell she didn't like the idea of being treated like an irresponsible kid. "I forgot I fell asleep outside, and the sun was coming down, so I guess it kinda was a good thing that she was there."

"Yeah," I said, barely containing the anxiety in my voice when I found out how close that call was. "Thankfully she was there."  
"Yeah, so how's Lissa doing?" She asked, meaning to sound casual, but I knew her well enough to know that she really was curious.

"You ask this every time I see you," I laughed. "She's okay, she misses you though."

She smiled, "Yeah, I know the feeling." We sat for a couple minutes before she added, "How are _you_ Adrian?" She looked at me, studying my face.

"I don't know," I answered truthfully. "There are the moments, when missing you just feels like to much to handle. But then there are others, when I'm with Christian, Lissa and Eddie, when I find that I can actually enjoy myself. I miss you Rose. I really wish you didn't have to leave; but I understand that there will always be a place in your heart that only _he _can fill. And no matter how much that might bother me, I can't change that and neither can you."

"I miss you to Adrian," she said softly, "much more than I thought I would. Much, Much more than I thought I ever would." We sat in a comfortable silence for a little while. I broke it.

"So, where are you?" I asked casually.  
She laughed, "I almost forgot. I ditched Guardian Sharpe back in Texas. Now I'm hitching a ride to Newport Beach. When I think I've gotten far enough way that she wont know were to find me, I think I'll ask Mason to lead the way to Dimitri. I don't wanna drag this out, I want it to be over soon."

"Don't hurry yourself Rose," I laughed. "Dimitri's strong, you shouldn't head into battle without preparing yourself first; you could get seriously hurt." My insides were burning with anxiety. I wish I were with her, not just in my head, but physically standing right next to her so I knew she would be safe. I didn't know how I would handle it if Rose were to be killed… or worse. "Rose, do me a favor, please." I asked. "Be careful. I don't wanna lose you."

"Adrian," she laughed. "Some faith, please. I'm pretty sure I can take care of myself.  
"It has nothing to do with your ability to take care of yourself Rose," I pleaded. "_I _can take care of _myself,_ but I don't even wanna think about how screwed I'd be if I were cornered by some skilled strigori. Or any strigori for that matter, spirit isn't really a weapon… well super compulsion could work, but I'm still learning and I'd be lucky to pull that off against a Morori. I know your strong, but maybe strength doesn't matter. Well, not physical strength anyways. He'll try to weaken you as best as he can. Dimitri was a very strong and skilled guardian, the strigori should count themselves lucky that they have him. Anyways, memories don't fade once you awaken. He'll remember your relationship, he'll use your feelings for him against you. You **cant** let them get in the way, you'll be easy prey."

"Adrian, I get that your worried about me, and I really do appreciate it, but you gotta trust me. The man I'm going after is not **my** Dimitri. He's a monster. **That's **why I have to do this. I have to kill him because he's no longer my Dimitri; he's a bloodthirsty monster who will always be a threat to me. If I ever wanna be a guardian, he needs to be destroyed; and I wanna be the one to do it. You can call it some crazy kind of closure," she laughed at the irony.

"Okay," I smiled, hoping she wouldn't realize how forced it was. She did.  
"Adrian," She started, but I interrupted her.

"Rose, I'll be fine, really. You shouldn't worry about me, you have enough on your hands." I took a deep breath, "I think I should go, we'll talk again soon."  
"When?" She asked.  
"Well, I can't tell you now," I laughed. "I want it to be a surprise."

"Bye Adrian, I miss you already." She said sadly.

"Bye honey," I replied. And with that, I forced myself awake. Maybe Rose didn't realize it, but I sure did. She was already growing warmer towards me, a few more visits, and maybe she could love me back. With that thought in mind, I fell back into a dreamless sleep.

I woke up earlier than usual. The sun probably only set a couple hours ago, so I got up and decided to go down to breakfast. I'd always wondered why Christian, Eddie and Lissa were always out in the library much earlier than I was, and I soon got my answer: they were early risers.  
"Adrian," Lissa said. "Your up early. Is something wrong?"

I yawed loudly before replying, "Nope. Just decided to mix things up for a change."

"Well that's good," Christian said. All of Christians old jealously towards me soon evaporated once he found out my true feelings for Rose; now he acted pretty civilized towards me. "The eggs are extra warm in the morning."

"Wonderful," I said. In truth, I didn't care how the academy's food tasted, I always ordered take out from one of the closest Royal food stores. They even started pre-cooking once they found out I'm Adrian Ivashkov, the queens favorite great nephew. It was amusing how much faster you can get your food if you casually mention how important you are to society. I don't even want to think about how quickly Lissa would get take out if she were to order. I mean, she was the one who would take over as queen as soon as something happens to my great aunt.

My put my head on the table and yawned again. "Maybe you shouldn't wake up so early," Lissa joked. "Your not much of a morning person are you?" I shook my head, and she laughed. "I thought not."

"No, I prefer the night." I said.

"Typical vampire stuff." Eddie said.

"Oh, I don't think he meant it that way Eddie," Lissa said, her voice wavering somewhere between disapproval and a desire to laugh. I was known for a lot of things: I always indulged myself in alcohol, cigarettes, and women. I guess Eddie was a little late to realize my joke.

"Oh," he laughed.

"So what do you wanna do today?" Lissa asked.  
"Oh, I can think of a few things," I said. Christian shot me a dangerous look. "Don't worry, Christian, its nothing bad. I found out some more cool things about spirit," I added in a whisper.  
"Really? What?" She asked eagerly.

"Come on, let's go to the library. We'll run less of a chance of getting overheard."


	4. Taboo

**A/N: Hey Guys, This is the longest chapter yet, & i've spent about three hours on it (: I feel so proud of myself. Anyways, i looked at my story traffic yesterday & almost JUMPED with excitement. yayaya. Lol (: So, if you'd all leave a review or two, i promise not to leave you on a cliff hanger before i go to Florida & i'll try to put more chapters up. Just one review per person & i could get like, fifty reviews. I would love you forever and forever and forever and forever if you did this for me. Tell me if you like the story, or if you dont. I'd hate to beg but, Please (:  
**

**Chapter Four**

Cuts on paper hearts  
They can be awful deep  
Rips from wear and tear on different city streets  
Don't all need a home, but just a place to sleep  
So I will run  
Until my feet don't touch the ground  
And as the waves carry me out  
We'll Keep listening  
She'll never make a sound

-Mayday Parade.

Adrian's P.O.V

I grabbed the books from my suit and met Lissa, Christian and Eddie in the library. I was right; final's were over a week and a half away, so nobody was cramming for them twenty/four seven yet. We were the only group in the library, besides a group of three of the academy's biggest nerds. They were usually here when we got there, so we've learned to ignore them; they keep to themselves, and so do we. When I explained everything I knew to Lissa, she looked pleasantly surprised; I knew she would appreciate this more than anybody else.

"It'll be difficult," I explained. "We're learning this without any instructions, since St. Vladimir was the only person in history whose ever learned it, and he's no longer alive. I don't know the limitations, or how far you can hear someone, or even if you have to be looking directly at them. As of now, I know absolutely no more than you do."

"Do you think that the person who's mind your reading can sense your presence?" She asked hopefully. "Like, if I were to read Rose's mind, would she know I was there? Can we put thoughts into their minds?" She was practically bouncing off her seat, it took all of my self control not to laugh; Christian wouldn't like me very much if I made fun of his girlfriend.  
"As for the first one, no I really don't think so. The girl in the book didn't say anything about sensing Vladimir's presence. But, as for putting thoughts into her mind… I don't know. It doesn't seem likely, but then again, neither does putting images in someone else's head by super compulsion. I told you Lissa, I know no more than you do; all I can tell you are my theories, and trust me… They aren't worth much."

"Wow," she said, exaggerating the word so that it had three syllables. "I can't believe I never thought about this before… I mean, it should've been an obvious possibility after we learned about super compulsion. I've always wished I could know what Rose was thinking, or feeling. I mean, its only fair right? Since, because of the bond, she knows what I'm thinking or feeling. Wow." Christian was looking at the floor, unsure of were he belonged in this conversation. Part of me wanted to change the subject to something Eddie and Christian would understand, but the other part of me knew that they needed to be able to deal with our conversation. She was the only spirit user I ever met, and vise versa. The only way we could learn was by learning together.  
"Don't get your hopes up Lissa," I said. "For all we know, there's some kind of limitation. Like, we have to at least know were the person is, or be near them."

"Do _you_ know were she is?" She asked, accusingly.  
"I know were she's going. But I don't know when she'll get there, or how long she'll be there." I answered truthfully.  
"Well?" She asked, "Where is she going?"

Rose's P.O.V

Newport Beach was beautiful, but the sun was already starting to set when we got there. But it was the most beautiful sunset I have ever seen.  
"So," said redneck in the drivers seat, "Where should I drop you off?"  
"Um, here would be fine," I answered, not wanting to spend another minute in the car with him. He insisted on learning my life story on the way up here. I told him some things, but I really just lied a lot.

_What's your name? _He had asked me. _Lissa Dragomir, _I had answered without thinking. I didn't know why I didn't tell him my real name; it was just the first name that rolled off my tongue. Plus, with me being on the run and all, I thought that maybe it was better that I didn't use my real name.

He pulled over to the side of the road, were a Starbucks was sitting next to a Wendys. I acted like I was going into the Starbucks until I saw him make a right and drive out of sight. I needed to inside if the sun was gonna set, and I didn't have much time. Humans closed their stores after night fell, so hiding in a shop was not even an option. Not that stores or anything would stop a Strigori. They could handle florescent, just not U.V Rays. I hoped I could get out of the way before the sun set completely under the horizon. _Maybe,_ said a hopeful voice in my head, _maybe there are no Strigori in Newport Beach._ But I knew I was kidding myself, Strigori were everywhere; you could never escape them. With a depressing thought, I realize that this was my life; I'd always be haunted by Strigori until every last one of them were destroyed. Even then, no one could be sure that they'd be gone forever… Morori would always have that choice. I walked, much slower than I should be under these particular conditions. I had my stake in my pocket, and I'd always know ahead of time if a Strigori was near, so I wasn't particularly worried, but I was cautious. Dhampir were taught to always be cautious.

Maybe I should've asked the man to drop me off at a near hotel. Instead, I was wondering streets I had never seen in my entire life, under dangerous conditions. The sun was almost completely beneath the horizon now. What would happen If I was ambushed by a group of Strigori? I asked, panicking.  
My stomach gave a particular nasty twirl, and with a scared thought, I realized I was just about to find out.

Adrian's P.O.V "Newport Beach? What on earth would she want there?" She asked, appalled. "I thought she was searching for Dimitri, what are the odds that he's in Newport Beach? I seriously doubt he'd be there for surfing."  
"I don't know Lissa, she didn't tell me why she was there. She just said she hitched a ride from someone, and he was going to Newport Beach." I answered. I knew Lissa cared about Rose and only wanted to keep her safe, but I was seriously regretting telling her were she was.  
"So…" Christian said, trying to steer the conversation in a different direction; I'm sure he was remembering Lissa's last outburst in the library. We could not spend all our time trying to calm her down. I shot Christian a thankful glance and he continued, "Did you hear what Jesse Zelkos said to Guardian Marsh?" "No Christian, what did he say?" She asked, sounding annoyed at his obvious attempt to change the subject. "Well, I'm not gonna repeat it, but he didn't do his homework, so Guardian Marsh was gonna give him detention. He started yelling and screaming a bunch of profanities at her. Needless to say, he was sent to the Principals office and was suspended."  
"Joy," said Lissa sarcastically.  
"Lissa, you need to stop. Your attitude is really starting to wear me out," Eddie said, his voice suggesting anger, although it was heavily masked by calm. "We're all worried about Rose, so you can stop biting our heads off for it. She wouldn't like you very much right now If she could see you, as matter of fact, I don't like you very much when you act like this."  
"And what am I acting like Eddie?" She asked, challengingly.

"A diva," he answered simply. Christian's eyes got big, and I could feel my jaw drop to the floor. Lissa's eyes narrowed.

"Well Eddie, its nice to know you feel so strongly about me. Maybe you should leave if you don't wanna hang out with me. I'm sure anybody would be my guardian if I asked them," She said. I couldn't help but notice how stuck up she sounded.  
"Lissa, this is **not** about you!" His voice was rising, and even Christian didn't bother sticking up for her. "Your acting like such a stuck up diva. This isn't even about Rose. She's gone, so you need to stop holding onto her. She'll come back or she won't. You can't keep punishing us for Rose leaving. She left for her own reasons, now we need to pay attention to more important stuff."

"What on earth is more important than the safety of my **best friend?**!" She screamed.  
"Final exams," he answered simply, tossing a book right in front of her. I knew he didn't mean it, he cared about Rose just as much as we did. But I could also tell he was sick of acting like Lissa needed sympathy; as a matter of fact, so was I, and so was Christian.  
"I cant **believe **you just said that," she said, outraged. Tears were threatening to spill from her eyes, as she looked at Eddie as though she's never seen him before. "Leave. Get out." She stuck a shaky finger in the direction of the door. Eddie got up without hesitation and left. She stood for several minutes, until she fell to the floor. She broke down into tears, wrapping her arms around her knees. Christian was torn between leaving and wrapping his arms around her to comfort her. Eddie was right, Lissa thought that she deserved sympathy for Rose's absence, and Christian didn't wanna encourage that. But he also didn't wanna see her in so much pain.

"I'm gonna leave," I said, announcing my excuse.  
"What? You think Eddies right? I thought you cared about Rose? I thought you loved her!" She shot at me. Since Eddie was gone, she wanted to lash out on someone else, so instead of muttering a comeback, I ignored her and left.

Lissa was out of control. I wondered if it had anything to do with her spirit, but then realized that spirit may drive you crazy, but it doesn't make act like a stuck up snob. I shook my head, in an attempt to clear it as my thoughts drifted to Rose. I wondered what she was doing, if she reached Newport Beach yet, if she's met anyone special…. _No_, I dismissed the thought from my head. She left to destroy Dimitri, not to find love. Then again. Fate has a plan of its own. Ever heard the cliché, _Finding love in places you least expect it?_ No. I was angry at Lissa, and my mind was attacking my heart. It was getting late; late enough to call it a night (vampire night, human morning.) I kicked off my shoes and socks and changed into a pair of comfy sweatpants. As I lay down to sleep, thoughts that I'd been able to repress in my consciousness attacked me.

_What if Rose doesn't make it back?_

No. She is strong. She could take care of herself.

_Could she? Against a dozen Strigori?_

Of course.

_You don't believe that, do you?_

No.

_I didn't think so._

She wont have to face a bunch of Strigori, only one.

_You think Dimitri will bet unprotected?_

No.

And even if she can get through all the other Strigori, how do you think she can face Dimitri? Dimitri's no longer alive, a monsters taken over. She wont let her feelings get in the way. But wont she? I don't know. **Rose's P.O.V**

There were six of them; and only one of me. I can feel the odds working in the favor as the each crept up to me on every side.

"We don't want to hurt you, we only wanna talk," Said the ugliest of the Strigori. "Why don't you come with us?"

"What? You think I was born yesterday, I'm not going with you anywhere," I said, my voice, at least was stronger than I felt.

"Careful," said one behind me, "this ones a guardian; she's got marks."

"Ah, so your not new to our methods are you sweetheart?" Asked the ugly one. "Well, then you should know that we are not a force to be reckon with." He laughed at the simple cliché.  
"And I'm Rose Hathaway," I answered, as though my name should scare them.

"Really? Guardian Hathaway's daughter?" Said one, impressed.  
"Come on, you should know that no matter how impressive the parents are, doesn't make the child worth anything," said the ugly one. "You've had the displeasure of meeting Christian Ozera, have you not?" The ugly one seemed to be the most talkative. "His parents were some of the best we've ever had, but their son just… doesn't compare."

"Christian Ozera is a great Morori, its to bad for you he's to good to be a Strigori," I said, surprised at myself for sticking up for Christian.

"Ah, your such a naive little girl," the ugly one said. "Do you and your mother have a close relationship?"

"Why?" I asked at his change in direction.

"Well, I'd love to be the one to be responsible for her daughters death if you have a close relationship." He said, and my stomach did a sick jolt.

"You sick…" But I was interrupted before I could think of any profanities to justify the outrage I wanted, or the fear I felt. A hand slid over to cover my mouth as an arm grabbed each of my wrists. It was depressing, to think that it would end now. I didn't even get in the same state as Dimitri, and I'd be taken out by half a dozen Strigori. Of course it's end this way. I was stupid to think I'd be a match against _Dimitri _if I couldn't even get through these losers.

I don't know where they took me, but it was dark. I was vaguely aware of my wrists being tied behind my back, my feet tied together on the floor and duck tape over my mouth.

_I'm surprised, _I could practically imagine Dimitri saying in my ear, _is that all it would take to stop you, if you were determined to go? _ With a painful jolt in my stomach, I was reminded of Spokane.

"Rosemarie Hathaway," cooed a voice I would know whether conscious or sleeping. But it was different; colder. I opened my eyes to find Dimitri's red eyes staring intently on me. His eyes swept over me, apparently unsatisfied over something. A thousand old insecurities attacked me at once as I wondered about my appearance. I shouldn't feel this way anymore; my heart shouldn't be so electrically aware that Dimitri was so close to me. I shouldn't have any feelings for him anymore; this wasn't **my Dimitri**. My Dimitri was dead. "What a pleasant surprise," He cooed, taking off the duck tape from my mouth. "You look exactly the same."  
"I wish I could say the same for you," I said sadly. He was still beautiful, but in a way that felt like it was teasing me. Letting me know everything I've lost in the last couple months.

"Oh, Roza," he said. He always called me Roza whenever he was feeling particularly affectionate towards me; it was my name in Russian. "I'm so sorry. I wish this didn't have to happen. I've been thinking about you every day; I love you."  
"No!" I screamed. "This cant be happening." Adrian told me he's do this, and I said that I wouldn't fall for it. But here I was, vulnerable; letting my feelings get in the way for what I had to do. "Please, Dimitri." I didn't know what to ask him. Not to hurt me? To let me know that he still loved me? **My **Dimitri was dead. The Dimitri that loved me was not longer alive. Only now, his memories rested with this creature in front of me.

"Oh, Roza, don't make this any harder than it has to be," He said, his eyes and face suggesting regret and sadness, but I knew him better… he was enjoying my pain, my indecision. I was easy prey, just as Guardian Sharpe had told me. "I don't want to hurt you." But he did. He wanted to hurt me so badly he was using all of his self-control not to take me now.

I guess that's how I got my self-control. As I saw his eyes turn to a blood-red, I knew that Dimitri wouldn't save me. And just as the man in front of me, I couldn't let my feelings for Dimitri get in the way. I knew that Dimitri was somewhere inside him, but so deep down, that I couldn't keep waiting for him. He wouldn't show, even if he was trying. He had been taken over by more pressing needs, like blood. "So is this how its going to be?" I asked angrily, no longer afraid, no longer bound by any emotional interference. "Your such a coward, your gonna kill me without a fight? How will you ever know who is stronger?" Dimitri, I knew, didn't like being called a coward. I hoped there was enough of him inside to still have that pet peeve.

"You stupid girl, I could easily destroy you. You are in no position to hold conditions," he snarled.

"Fine Dimitri," I said, stubbornly. "But if you think you could easily kill me, why not **prove **it? I mean if you're so strong, you'll have nothing to lose."

"No. Not now," he said thoughtfully. "I **will **kill you, just not yet." He stood up, threw one last longing glance at my neck, and then left. I was still bound to the chair, which made things a little complicated. I didn't know where the other strigori were, and if they were coming back, so I really needed to get out of there. I used my teeth to bite the ropes around my legs. It tasted nasty, and it hurt my teeth, but I eventually got the last of the ropes to fall to the ground. I stood up to get closer to my arms. I almost tripped. I reached my hands out behind me and felt something sharp poke my fingers. Holding my breath, I used the sharp edge to cut the ropes off my wrist, scratching up my arms as I did so. It took less time to get off than my legs, so I was soon ready to find my way out. There was minimum light in the building, only a flicker or two. I was reminded of a horror movie as I crept down the long, dark hallway. They floor was wet with small puddles, which made the sound _clack, clack, clack_. I kept my hands gliding on the wall, looking for an opening. I severely hoped I was going the right way. A break between the wall informed me of a new path. I rook the right, and with much triumph, saw a light at the end of the tunnel. It wasn't facing me straight on, so I guessed we were in the sewers, or some underground facility. It was sunlight either, but light from the moon, which informed me that it was still night. I had the impression I'd been in here a lot longer than just a few hours. Once I got directly underneath the source of the light, I looked up. There was a latter a foot about me, so I grabbed it with my bruised hand and push myself off the ground. Slowly, careful not to make any unnecessary noise, I made my way up the ladder.


	5. I will always love you

**A/N: Hey guys. I just wanted to thank you again for reading my story. I think I'll be able to get at least three or four more chapters up before i go to Panama City. Also, I'm kinda getting tired of using French titles, so I'll use a language we can all understand.... PORTUGUESE. Just kidding. I'll be taking French class in the fall, so I'm semi excited about that. Review Review Review. I hope you like this chapter, I'd hate to think i moved it up a little to quickly, but i wanna get to the good stuff. And for all you Adrian Fans out there (myself included) i think you will, in particular, like this chapter. (: You'll see why. & P.s, i love Dimitri, and i cried when he went Strigori, but Adrian is just so much better for Rose. (: **

**Chapter Five**

I've seen sinking ships go down with more grace than you  
Turn this up I'll tune you out  
Another night alone in the city, yeah  
Fake it like you matter-that's a lie we can both keep, ohh  
Every friend we ever had in common  
I will sever the tie, sever the tie with you  
You can thank your lucky stars  
That everything I wish for will never come true

-Fallout Boy

**Rose's P.O.V**

The roads were clear, and exhaled a breath I wasn't even aware I was holding. I didn't know what I expected: for a bag to cover my head the moment my neck was above the floor level? For Strigori to be surrounding the entrance, waiting for my arrival? To recapture me the moment I thought I was safe? Pushing all thoughts out of my mind, I gave myself over to my instincts; I ran. I ran as far as my legs would take me; I ran until the sun rose far above the horizon. When I passed by a Waffle House, I stopped. My stomach was growling so fiercely, I was afraid the people inside the building would here. I bent over, putting my hands on my knees, and tried to catch my breath. I went through several breathing exercises until I was breathing evenly again. I stood up straight and walked through the front entrance. Hopefully I didn't smell to badly, I haven't had a shower since I left the academy. I was so hungry I felt like I was suffering from near starvation, so I ordered the All-Star Special Breakfast. It included a large waffle, two sunny-side up eggs, two pieces of toast, two pieces of sausage and a cup of coffee. I ate quickly, devouring my meal and gulping down my coffee. I hadn't realized at the time, but it was an aftermath of shock. I left fifteen dollars on the table, unsure of how much the meal cost. As I got up to leave, I almost screamed as I saw who was standing three feet away from me. She hadn't noticed me yet, she was searching the diner, evidently looking for someone. It must be me she's looking for, said a voice in my head.

"Excuse me," Guardian Sharpe said to a couple nearby. "Have you seen a girl, about eighteen years old; waist length dark brown hair?" I slid down my seat, ready to crawl out if necessary.  
"I don't think so," said the man. "What's her name?"

"Rose Hathaway," she answered. She was definitely looking for me. I took a deep breath and lowered myself to my hands and knees. I crawled underneath the nearest table; in the opposite direction of Guardian Sharpe. I repeated the process until I was underneath the table closest to the door. Slowly, I got out from underneath the table and turned my back on Guardian Sharpe. I opened the door, and swiftly left.  
"Rose!" Adrian Ivashkov called, "Are you okay? You look terrible." He said, hurrying to my side. Behind him were three of the academy squad cars. "Rose?"

"You… told?" I asked, glaring at Adrian.

"No, of course not," he said sincerely. "Guardian Sharpe's been following you since you got in the car with that guy back in Texas. She called in reinforcements a couple nights ago when you were taken into that tunnel. She said she didn't see you coming out. She searched the tunnels underneath all day yesterday. She came here, trying to see if anyone's seen you… Rose, how did you get out of there alive? I heard there were like, six Strigori."

"Seven," I answered sadly. "Dimitri was there," I elaborated after seeing the confusion on his face. His facial expression changed to that of understanding and sympathy. "How's Lissa?"

"Ugh," he groaned. My eyes widened with surprise; Adrian and Lissa have always gotten along, especially after she found out about him being a spirit user. "She's been acting like such a…" but he was interrupted before I could hear what she was acting like.  
"Rose, were gonna take you back to the academy for a few days. You can leave again soon, we don't have the right to keep you there, we just need to get you out of Newport Beach for awhile," said a guardian I recognized from the academy. He was always one to guard the gates, Christian had a hard time trying to use compulsion against him when we were trying to look for Mason, Mia, and Eddie.  
"Why?" I asked.

"It's not safe here," he answered simply, although he sounded like there was more to it. "The Strigori in the tunnels fled before we could get there, so they're loose somewhere."  
"**I **need to be the one who destroys Dimitri," I challenged.

"I understand, but ex Guardian Belikov is no longer with them," he answered.  
"Oh, okay," I answered, dumbstruck. "But only for a few days." Adrian looked like he was gonna start jumping up and down; he looked ecstatic.

"Your gonna come back, really?" He asked, he was grinning from ear. He looked like a kid who just found out Christmas was coming a whole month early.

"Not for long," I answered, smiling back. I didn't wanna get his hopes up; "I cant stay, I still haven't finished what I left for."

"We've really missed you Rose," he answered, his eyes smoldering me.

**Adrian's P.O.V**

It didn't take much persuasion to make the Guardians let me come to the meeting for tonight. When spirit users used compulsion, it was almost as strong as Strigori's compulsion.

"Now, We've got some information from some reliable sources who say they've got evidence of where some Strigori are residing," Said Guardian What's-his-name.

"And?" Asked another guardian who I couldn't recognize. My ears went big, trying to listen into their conversation, while appearing not to care.

"Well, Guardian Youmings said he say some Strigori in California," answered the guardian leading the conversation. "Another guardian said they spotted four in Alaska. Three were spotted in New Hampshire…. And seven were spotted in Newport Beach," she finished.

"**NO!**" I roared. Everyone looked at me, and I realize I was on my feet.  
"Lord Ivashkov," said the guardian leading the discussion. She looked somewhere between livid and surprised. "Can you explain yourself?" Newport Beach was small, what was the possibility Rose would run into the Strigori? If there weren't any chance, I'd just be ratting her out for nothing. But the chance was to large; I didn't like to take chances when it came to Rose. Roses are Red, I thought contently, trying to calm myself before continuing. Rose likes Red, I laughed at the silly nursery rhyme.

"Rose is in Newport Beach," I said sadly, hoping Rose wouldn't find out about my betrayal.

"Rose Hathaway?" Asked one of guardians who had, thus far, been silent. She looked at me like she was seeing me for the first time. "How could you possibly know where she is? She hasn't been in contact with anyone from the academy since she left."

"Haven't you heard of Spirit?" I asked, making my voice sound as though it should have been obvious. "I've talked to her, but only in dreams."  
"So, you've talked to Rose… in your dreams?" She said, sounding as though she thought I needed to be medicated.

"Go to Newport Beach, if you find Rose there, then you could shut your judgmental mouth. If not, I was vouch anymore ideas again."

I was using compulsion on her now; we needed to get to Newport Beach and save Rose before she runs into those Strigori.

"Yes," she said, her eyes glossing over slightly. No one would notice what was happening, I've learned to make compulsion look undetectable. "We should go, just to be safe."  
"Okay," said the guardian who was originally leading the conversation. "Adrian, get your stuff ready. We leave in an hour."

The leading guardians made plans with Guardian Sharpe. She would be in Newport Beach in a little under twenty minutes; She was currently in Santa Ana. We boarded the private jet; we'd be there in thirty minutes.

I didn't know **why**we were outside of Waffle house, but it was apparently the closest building to the tunnels nearby.

I stood to the right of the glass door, out of sight from anybody leering in through inside the window. It didn't take long before I saw Rose scurrying out of it.

"Rose!" I called, "Are you okay? You look terrible." I hurried to her side, wanting to be near her; no matter how short our time would be together "Rose?" I asked. For a second I thought she'd gone deaf.

"You… told?" She asked, glaring at me. I looked behind myself, and for a short second, I thought I might tell her the truth.

"No, of course not," I said, trying not to feel guilt about lying to her. All my worries seemed stupid as I saw her in front of me. She was alive, I didn't know what I else I expected. "Guardian Sharpe's been following you since you got in the car with that guy back in Texas. She called in reinforcements a couple nights ago when you were taken into that tunnel. She said she didn't see you coming out. She searched the tunnels underneath all day yesterday. She came here, trying to see if anyone's seen you… Rose, how did you get out of there alive? I heard there were like, six Strigori."

"Seven," She answered, and I saw her face fall. I must have not done a good job at pretending to understand, cuz she elaborated, "Dimitri was there," Dimitri; my eyes got wide. I was about to comfort her, but she changed the subject, not wanting my sympathy. "How's Lissa?" She asked.

"Ugh," I groaned. "She's been acting like such a…" but before I could utter a single profanity that rolled so well off my tongue while I thought of Lissa's behavior over the last few weeks, we were interrupted.  
"Rose, were gonna take you back to the academy for a few days. You can leave again soon, we don't have the right to keep you there, we just need to get you out of Newport Beach for awhile," said the guardian who was leading the discussion back in the academy.  
"Why?" she asked. I could tell she didn't like the idea of coming back.

"It's not safe here," he answered simply, although he sounded like there was more to it. "The Strigori in the tunnels fled before we could get there, so they're loose somewhere."  
"**I **need to be the one who destroys Dimitri," her eyes narrowed, and for a second I was afraid of her.

"I understand, but ex Guardian Belikov is no longer with them," he answered. Yeah, Buddy, I thought simply, I wouldn't wanna cross Rose when she was this determined.  
"Oh, okay," She answered; surprised he wasn't going to argue. "But only for a few days." I couldn't contain my happiness; Rose would be coming back.

"Your gonna come back, really?" I asked when the guardian left. I hoped she was just saying that to appease the guardian.

"Not for long," she answered, returning my smile. "I can't stay, I still haven't finished what I left for."

"We've really missed you Rose," I smiled.

"Can you believe it," She laughed. "But I actually missed you guys to."

We got into the jet, and all hopes of conversation evaporated when I saw that she fell asleep, five minutes into the flight. But I was still content, as long as I could watch her sleep.

**Rose's P.O.V**

I knew the moment we got onto academy's property: my constant headache vanished. And if that wasn't enough to convince me, I had Adrian there to nudge me and whisper into my ear, "We're back."

I smiled, and for the first time since I left the academy, it wasn't forced. St. Vladimir's was my home; the only place I'd ever really known. Once we landed, I saw Lissa Dragomir, standing on her tiptoes, with tears flowing uncontrollably down her face. She was happy to see me, which made me feel that much better.

"Oh Rose!" She yelled, pulling me into a tight embrace. "I am so sorry for the things I said, I didn't mean a single one of them. I'm so glad your back. I've missed you so much. Promise me you'll never leave me again." I couldn't truthfully promise her that, so I hugged her back and we both cried.

"Oh Lissa," I said softly, "Life just isn't the same without you there to nag me all the time." She laughed a shaky laugh and I felt myself being pulled into another hug. Christian.

"Rose I gotta say, I really did miss you. St. Vladimir's is pretty boring without you around to pick on," he said. He didn't hug me as long as Lissa did, and next I was hugging Eddie.  
"We've missed you," was all he could say. Finally, I felt Adrian pull me into a hug. It was different that the other ones, more intimate.

"I never got a hug," he teased lightly. His arms were around my waist, and mine were around his neck; my face stayed hidden in his chest. I hadn't realized I was crying until he tilted my head back and wiped away my tears. He kissed my forehead, and brushed my hair out of my face. The scene around us was still, but not surprised; it was expectant.

"Oh Adrian," I cried.

"I love you Rose," he said softly. My heart stopped, and I was aware that I had grown still. But somehow, I knew what he said was true. And I was telling the truth when I answered,

"I love you two," he pulled back and searched my face.

"Don't say it if you don't mean it," his eyes were cautious, but I knew he was ecstatic that I said it back.

"I do mean it," I answered, my face was calm. "It took me awhile to realize it but now I know. I love you Adrian. Not in the same way as I loved Dimitri, but more than anybody else. Part of my heart will always belong to him, but the rest is yours… if you want it." He spun me around in a circle before he said,

"Rose, I couldn't imagine someone I could love more than you, you have my heart, and my soul and frankly… my piece of mind. I was going sick with worry while you were gone." He kissed me again, but this time, on the lips. It wasn't a heart stopping, breath-taking kiss like with Dimitri, but it was second best. I needed to stop comparing Adrian and Dimitri, said a voice in my head. They were two completely different people.

Christian, Eddie and Lissa broke out into applause. I laughed, hiding my face in Adrian's chest.

Adrian Ivashkov and Rose Hathaway… If only the queen could see me now.


	6. A Final Shread of Hope

**Chapter Six**

_Let it go  
There's no way you can save me now  
Get back, you know, That this city is burning  
So the story goes, It makes you wonder  
'Cause if we're trapped and we're never gonna find a way out,  
Get out, We're gonna dance now_

_-Cobra Starship_

**Adrian's P.O.V**

We let Rose have a couple hours to unpack and shower. The fight from earlier seemed forgotten since Eddie was sitting with us again in the library. Lissa and Eddie were grinning from ear to ear and Christian was barely concealing a smile of his own. However, I'd have to think that I glowed a little bit more than them…

How many times did I fantasize hearing Rose tell me she loved me? How many times did I wanna kiss her?

Well, needless to say, both happened all in one day; I couldn't help but smile. Lissa was looking at me, obviously satisfied over Rose and me.

"So Adrian," said Lissa. "How was your day?" She was gloating a little, but then again, so was I.

"Absolutely amazing," I answered, and, if it were possible, Lissa's smile grew even larger.

"I would think so," said Eddie, laughing. Christian and Lissa joined into his laughter. Sure it wasn't that funny, but it's been a long time since we've had something to laugh about. You could say we were making up for old times sake.

Rose came walking into the library, looking as beautiful as I could remember. I could smell her shampoo and body wash; strawberry. _Mmm, _I thought. All three chairs at the table were occupied, so she sat in my lap. "Hey," she said tossing her hair on her back and smiling sweetly at me.  
"Hey," I replied, my answering smile was dazzling. "Do you wanna go for a walk?" I asked, gesturing towards the door.

"Hey," Lissa cried, faking a hurt voice. "Don't keep Rose all to yourself. We've missed her to, and we can't walk through dreams to see her."  
"It won't take long," I answered, keeping my eyes on Rose as I answered Lissa. Or maybe I was reassuring Rose.

"I'll see you later Lissa," Rose said, getting off my lap. She took my hand and led me to the door. We walked in silence until we were outside; I couldn't help but notice several eyes walking us.

"So," I said, trying to start a conversation. "About us…"  
"Your not breaking up with me, are you?" She asked, mistaking my nervousness. Was it obvious how awkward I felt?

"No Rose, of course not," I said, trying to laugh. "But that's what I want to know. Is there an 'us' now?" I looked down to the ground, avoiding her eyes.

"I don't know," Rose said thoughtfully. "I love you, and you love me. Do you _want _there to be an us?" She asked, staring contently at me.

"Yes," I answered. I looked up at her, gaining some of my swagger back. "I really, really do."  
"Then," she said, faking thoughtfulness. "I guess there is." _Rose Ivashkov, _Said a voice in my head; it had a brilliant ring to it. _Ring, maybe I should propose…. _No, Rose can't be distracted. There's definitely a difference in how a girlfriend feels to a boyfriend, then how fiancée's reacted. She was only eighteen, and I was only twenty-one. We had a long time to think about marriage… But if she died on her quest to kill Dimitri, how much time did we really have left?

_I'll think about this later._

We walked back to the library, still holding hands. I was kind of surprised to see that Lissa, Christian and Eddie were gone. "Where do you think they went?" I asked.

"Hold on," she said, closing her eyes. I knew what she was doing; she was using the bond to find out where Lissa was. Suddenly, I felt her go still.

"Rose?" I asked. She let go of my hand, and screamed. "Rose, what's wrong? What's happening?" I asked, aware my voice was turning hysterical.

**Rose's P.O.V**

When we came into the library, Lissa, Eddie and Christian had left.  
"Where do you think they went?" Adrian asked, looking around the library; trying to find some sign of our friends.  
"Hold on," I answered. I tried to relax myself so I could slip inside of Lissa's head. I was getting glimpses of her, but not any full pictures. I let go of Adrian's hand, hoping that if I let go of where I was, I'd be able to see through Lissa. I didn't know why, but I felt extremely anxious. It worked, and I could feel myself slipping inside Lissa's head.  
They were outside. I could feel paranoia inside Lissa; she felt like she was being watched.  
"Lissa?" Christian asked, smiling at her. "What's wrong?" The answer came on it's own.

Strigori had only broken the wards once, and that was because of Jesse Zelkos's group, who used all sorts of magic around it. However, the answer to how the wards broke, was also answered. _Humans. _Strigori were coming from all sides, there must have been at least three dozen of them. And, to Lissa's dismay, they were all staring at her. There were only three of them: and she could feel the numbers working in their favor. She would die, was all she could think about. They day she finally had Rose back and she would die.

I pulled myself out of Lissa's head. I had to get there, quickly. But I didn't think that I had enough time.

"Rose, What's wrong? What's happening?" Adrian asked, and I could hear the panic rising in his voice.  
"Lissa," I answered, breathless. "Strigori. Christian. Eddie." I couldn't get out full sentences; I couldn't breathe. I ran as fast as my legs would take me; faster than I ran in Newport Beach; faster than Adrian could ever hope to achieve.

He was yelling for help; filling nearby guardians in on the current events. Some came with us; some ran to alert the other guardians. I let myself view glimpses from Lissa's head, all to aware that more Strigori were coming in through the wards. _The school was no longer safe. _A Strigori breaks in once, and it can be ignored, forgotten; a Strigori breaks in twice, and there is no possible way the school can continue unless we can think of a foolproof way of securing the school. The children at this school were, once again, vulnerable.  
Lissa, Eddie and Christian were still alive. I've never been more thankful that Christian specializes in Fire; or that Eddie was beastly guardian. Hopefully, they could keep themselves safe until reinforcements arrived. I hoped Adrian had the common sense to stay away.

It was ironic, that the place the Strigori, Lissa, Christian and Eddie are, is the same place that the Strigori came through last time. Maybe they should just put extra wards around this area. I was soon close enough to feel the Strigori, which made me feel a whole lot more optimistic. Maybe I could get to them before it's to late. I turned to the left at the end of the corner, but several things made me stop. The blonde Strigori I met during our ambush was there; the one that was oh-so keen on making the Dragomir line extinct. There were also forty Strigori surrounding my friends. It was odd because Strigori never traveled in packs. Usually, there were two or** maybe **three. **Never, **did they travel in more than that. But most importantly, Dimitri was there. He was standing across the lawn, staring at me, a smile playing on his beautifully set lips. I took a deep breath and continued running. I

stabbed three with my stake before they even knew they were being intruded. Christian was helping me by shooting fire at some of the Strigori. It didn't take long until we were joined by seven more guardians. I pulled up my stake, ready to attack an unsuspecting Strigori, but then I felt a hand grab my wrist, forcing me to lower it. He turned me around to face him, and my breath caught. _Dimitri. _He said he was going to kill me, and now I knew it was the time. A circle formed around us, spectators unsure of what they should do; they watched.

"Oh, Roza," Dimitri laughed.

"Yes, Comrade?" I asked, using a nickname I knew Dimitri didn't like. We circled around each other in a defined circle, neither daring to look away. I lunged, but he blocked. He grabbed my arms and threw me into a group of bystanders. I heard Lissa struggle to catch her breath; but I wouldn't go down that easily. I stood up, rubbing the bruise on my wrist that formed a perfect replica of his fingers. _He'd always be apart of me, _said a sad, unpleasant voice in my head. Again, I lunged. I would've gotten him, if he's been anyone else. But he was Dimitri; a god. He knew all my moves.

"Oh, Rose," he sighed, shaking his head in disapproval. "Did I teach you nothing?" He lunged, knocking me off my feet and forcing me to the ground. He didn't pursue me there, he was having way to much fun watching me struggle. I got to my feet and punched him across the face with my stake. It only made a scratch, but it gave me hope; _He's not invincible, _I thought. He grabbed my wrist and twisted it; I heard a sickening _crack_ and I yelled in pain. _He broke my wrist! _I thought in outrage. Using my left hand, I tried to stab him in the heart, but again, he pulled me to the floor. This time, he crouched down beside me. His left hand grabbed my right wrist, and his right hand crossed my chest and held my left wrist; His face was inches from my neck. "Rose," he laughed. "Didn't I tell you, to never let a Strigori get a clear shot at your throat?" He lowered himself down, closing in the space between my neck and his teeth. He wouldn't play this out much longer; I could see his eyes growing darker from thirst. I stared into his eyes, hoping to find_ some _evidence of the Dimitri I knew and loved inside this monster; but there was none. My Dimitri was dead, and this creature in front of me was going to prove it, but killing me. I closed my eyes, the anxiety consuming me. Pain beyond anything I ever imagined pulsed in my neck. I screamed, as loud as I have ever screamed in my life. I could hear Lissa's muffled crying, and I could see Christian looking on with a mingled feeling of pity and disgust. I wondered why nobody was helping me. Why wouldn't anybody pull Dimitri off? The pain consumed every molecule in my body and soon, l I started to feel exhausted. I couldn't think of anything but the pain. I was going to die, and nobody from the academy was going to come to my aid and help me.

'

**Adrian's P.O.V**

I didn't have a chance to keep up with Rose; she was running way to fast. Instead, I decided to alert the guardians at the academy. I saw Rose running down the yard at full speed, and I took a left inside the closest building.  
"Strigori!" I yelled at the four guardians at the front desk. "Quickly! Strigori have broken into the school." They looked at me, unsure of whether they should believe me or not.

"How?" One asked. They knew my reputation, and they didn't know if this was a prank, or if I was actually telling the truth.

"Humans!" I yelled, not having to fake outraged. "Humans broke the wards. Hurry! Lissa, Christian, Eddie, and Rose need your help." Three of the four ran out the door, but the one who spoke stayed behind.  
"Hurry Ivashkov," he said. "We need to warn the school."

We went into three different buildings (one was empty) and sent four more guardians down to were the Strigori were. My job, said the guardian in charge of the Morori safety, was to stay behind. I felt nauseous, not knowing what was happening to Rose, Lissa, Christian and Eddie. I couldn't imagine what would happen if, as soon as Rose and me worked out a relationship, she was taken away from me. With a pang of sympathy, I realized that was what happened to Rose, when Dimitri was awakened. I pushed the thought out of my mind; it wouldn't happen to us. As time grew on, I became more worried.  
I excused myself to the bathroom and, when I thought the guardian wasn't looking, I slipped outside. It would be awhile until he realize I was gone, and he was in no position to ditch the Morori in the building to come and find me.I didn't know what I was going to do, but I needed to see that Rose was okay. When I got to the clearing where I knew the Strigori were, I saw a circle, gathering around two people fighting. I couldn't see who it was that was fighting, but I found it slightly unusual, how they were the only ones fighting. As I got closer, I saw that it was a guy and a girl. The guy seemed strangely familiar, like and old-time friend I haven't seen in years… but I couldn't put a name to his face. I only saw the back of the girl, but she had familiar dark brown hair… _Rose._ I was obviously coming in at the end of the fight, or at least the middle? Lissa was standing at the other side of the circle, her hands slapped over her mouth, her eyes full of unshed tears. I watched Lissa until I heard a scream. It was blood curling; a scream you would hear in a horror movie, when the main character was being tortured. It was a girls voice, and my mind went temporarily blank. I looked down at her face. And my mouth opened in a way that looked like I would start screaming. I wanted to. Tears filled my eyes, and I was surprised; I never cried. "Rose!" I yelled, but she was unable to hear me. She was all consumed in the bite of a Strigori. "Rose!" I yelled even louder. "Get up!"

But she wouldn't get up; she seemed unable to move. I tried to push past the crowd in front of me, but they were so packed together that it was almost impossible. My eyes never left Rose as I saw her skin grown an unhealthy shade of white. He was going to drain all the blood from her body, and I was going to have to watch.

The crowd was cramped to close together, so I didn't have any chance of getting to Rose.  
"Rose!" I screamed, my voice rising as I prayed for her to hear me. "Please get up! Fight back!" I could hear other people screaming in the audience, but the Strigori had us all cornered. There wasn't any chance of anyone helping Rose… She would have to die. _No! _I yelled at myself, unable to deal with the pain. "Get up Rose!" I screamed, my voice rising up an octave and leading toward hysterics. Strong hands were restraining me from behind my back. "Get off of me!" I screamed to the perpetrator. I tried wiggling out of the strangers grasps, but he was to strong… I didn't know what to do, but I wasn't just going to sit around and do nothing. I turned around to face the stranger and thought of a different scenario to put into his mind. A moment later, I could see the affects and I knew it was working. His eyes were out of focused, and a look of terror spread across his face. His grip on my arms loosened and I yanked myself away from him. I was closing the space between Rose and I quickly. Dimitri sat by her side, his teeth sinking into her neck. I ran and jumped on his back. He pulled away from Rose and laughed.

"Get off of me you ignorant little moron," he said in a dangerous voice. "You are making a very bad move." He grabbed my shoulders and slammed my back into the ground. Pain seared through my spine, which was the only thing that lead me to believe it wasn't broken yet. I was persistent. He didn't even have a chance to lower his teeth back to Rose's neck before I was putting pictures inside his mind… Spiders? _No, this freak wouldn't be afraid of any spiders. _I changed the vision. A holy temple? _No, Strigori couldn't go into churches, but that didn't mean they were afraid of them. _The light… _No, they weren't afraid of the sunlight, they just couldn't walk through it. _I thought hard before I changed the vision again… I hoped there was enough of Dimitri in there to be affected by the next thing I showed him. Rose, beaten and broken; she was laying on the sidewalk, a pool of blood surrounding the back of her head, and her eyes unfocused. He flinched. I found it ironic how _he _would flinch when it was _him _who was trying to kill her. The visions in my head continued to become more graphic… and I made him watch. He backed away, his eyes marking him with insanity.

It looked like Dimitri was still in there, and he was forcing this monster to leave. Anyway, he did as he was told; Dimitri ran. The rest of the Strigori followed him, and soon the school was rid of the Strigori. I knelt beside Rose; her skin was paler than I have ever seen and he neck was defined by her new vampire bite. I was pushed away by Guardian Stan, who was in a rush to pick Rose up and taker her to the nurses office. I watched in shock, knowing I wouldn't be able to keep up even if I did try to run.  
"Adrian," Lissa said, astonished. "Did you do that? Did you use super compulsion?" I nodded my head, not trusting my voice. She stared at me in awe, while my eyes followed the disappearing figure of Stan.

**A/N: Hey guys, sorry for the delay in getting this chapter out, but I just got back from Panama Yesterday evening & I slept until six thirty today. Anyways, I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter & Review it. Tell me what you think. **


	7. Healing

I'm coming home, I'm coming home  
Did you take off while I was gone?  
I missed it all, I messed you up, I missed you  
I'm coming home, I wanna know  
When all the leaves begin to fall  
If I'm falling, falling apart for you.  
Descending, I'm spinning  
Lost all defense  
How could you swallow me again?

_-Hey Monday._

Rose's P.O.V

My head was spinning, and my bones felt as though they'd been lit on fire. I felt sore, and I was unable to move for the longest time in my life. I could vaguely remember coming in and out of consciousness; Adrian never left my side. It took hours until I could form a coherent sentence around anyone, my mind was running on low fuel and my eyes were shifting in and out of focus. I must have been asleep for days, but I was still exhausted when I woke up.  
"Where am I?" I asked, not entirely looking for an answer. "What happened?" Adrian was looking down at me with sympathetic eyes. It was a weird thing to see, considering how hard-core he is.  
"Your in the nurses office," he answered, his voice not showing any emotion. Before I could ask, I saw in a movie-like showing of the events of the day I was put in here. _Dimitri. _  
"What happened?" I asked a little more urgently. "How did I survive?"  
"Dimitri left," he said flatly. "So did the others."  
"Was anyone hurt?" I asked.

"No," he said. "Everyone else was fine." I didn't understand why Dimitri left, but something told me Adrian wouldn't answer my question if I asked. He sat in silence, his eyes never leaving my face until Guardian Stan cam in and suggested he go to the feeders. Adrian stood up and left, and Stan took his seat.

"Are you okay Rose?" He asked me. His sympathy surprised me since we never got along. We always found ourselves arguing in his classes.  
"Yeah, I guess," I answered. "Well, my head hurts." He chuckled.

"Well, it could've been much worse," He was about to stand up and leave but I pulled my hand out, grabbing his wrist to stop him.**"**  
"Why did they leave?" I asked. "They could've had all of us… Strigori don't usually abandon a fight, do they?" Stan looked like he was about to answer, but the nurse came in at that exact moment.

"All right, Rose," The nurse said. "I think it's time your visitors left; you need some rest."  
"But I've been sleeping for _days_," I complained. She smiled at me.

"Trust me," she laughed. "You'll feel much better when you wake up.  
She was injecting something into the tube that was connected to my arm. I immediately felt exhausted.

"I don't wanna sleep," I said groggily. My eyes were threading to close and my throat felt itchy dry.

"Don't argue Rose," I could hear Stan saying in the background. "We'll talk later." I listened to his footsteps as he left the room. Finally, when the weight of sleep became to much for me to handle, I let myself be pulled into unconsciousness.

**Adrian's P.O.V**

I didn't know what was stopping from me telling Rose what happened… I mean, she wouldn't be mad that I saved her life, right? I would think she'd be thankful. But something told me that Rose wouldn't like to know that I risked my life for her… As a matter of fact, I didn't even think about it that way when I was trying to get Dimitri off of her, as a matter of fact, I wasn't thinking at all… I just acted on impulse. I didn't realize where I was going, but my legs were taking me to t he library. I sighed, knowing Christian, Eddie and Lissa would be there waiting for me to tell them how Rose is.  
I was right; Lissa nearly pounced on me when I rounded the corner towards our usual table.  
"Is she all right?" She asked, obviously she was worrying about her.  
I was the only person on campus (besides the teachers) who was allowed to visits Rose. I thought it might have something to do with being the queens' favorite nephew. Lissa had considered using compulsion on the Morori guards so that she could visit, too. However, I warned her it would be a bad idea… The others would notice there was more to spirit than we let them know, and they'd assume we used it against everyone for anything we wanted. So compulsion was out of the question…  
"Yeah," I answered. "She was awake for a little while." Her eyes widened, and a smile spread across her face.  
"That's good," she said, he smile growing more pronounced. "At least we know she's going to heal. I have to admit, I had my doubts."  
"I can't believe Dimitri over-powered her so easily. I mean, I've always kinda thought of Rose as a god. She's always been one of the best in our classes, and well, even though she was gone for two years- she can still kick major butt at the academy," Eddie said, looking amazed. "I guess there's always someone somewhere in the world who's better than you. And Rose has finally met her match."  
"Yeah," Christian agreed. "I just wish it wasn't Dimitri… I mean, I wish it was someone on **our **side, someone who wouldn't want to hurt Rose. I mean, she'd probably be able to deal with it better if she was weaker than someone on her own side, rather than the enemy…" He shook his head in an attempt to clear it. "This is all just so messed up."

"Do you think she can do it?" Lissa asked, her voice small. "Do you think she can defeat Dimitri?"

"At this point," Eddie answered with a sigh, "I really don't know."  
We sat in silence, all thinking about Eddie's words. Would she be strong enough to defeat Dimitri? Or would she die, like she should have died yesterday? I leaned forward and put my head in my hands.

Christian was right; this was really messed up.

I started wondering if Rose would ever be discharged… She had been in the nurses' office for over a week, and she's barely made any progress towards healing. Whenever I visit, she's always going on about how all this medical care is delaying her in her real objective. I really wish she would calm down; it wasn't helping her get better.

"Adrian," she said one day. I looked up at her; surprised she was talking to me. We hadn't really been carrying much of a conversation since I got here… sometimes I doubt she even knows I exist.

"Yes?" I asked her, pulling my head out of my hands.

"I'm sorry," she whispered so quietly it was almost inaudible.

"What for?" I asked, tilting my head to the side to indicate I was confused.

"For everything," she said in her normal voice. "I'm sorry I don't ever talk to you; I'm sorry I'm not much fun to be around anymore; I'm sorry I'm in the hospital because of my psychotic ex-boyfriend; I'm sorry I never realized before how much I love you; I'm sorry I can't give you my whole heart, because some of it still belongs to him; I'm sorry for hurting you so much, even though I never wanted to; I'm sorry I've never been nice to you; IM SORRY!" She said, her voice rising.  
"Oh honey," I said, putting my arm around her, which was difficult since she had so many needles poking into her. "There was never anything to apologize for. Its not your fault; and I don't blame you. Your everything I want, and if I have to have you broken and bleeding, than that's the way I'll take it. Because I couldn't imagine being with anyone other than you." I leaned down and kissed her forehead. She looked down, trying to hide the tears in her eyes. "Don't," I warned her. I cupped my hand around her chin and lifted her face up, wiping away her tears with my spare hand. "Please don't be sad."  
"Why?" She asked me, pushing my hand away. "Why are you being so understanding? This isn't like you! Your suppose to be all hard-core. Not mister softy."

"Well," I said, pondering. "Would you rather I be mad at you?" I asked, searching her face.

"Yes," she said, wiping the tears out of her eyes.

"Well then," I answered. I tried to mask my face in anger. "Rose Hathaway," I said, anger and disapproval wavering out of my voice. "How **dare **you repeatedly break my heart? You are a terrible, terrible person. I've been here for you since the day we met, but you can't stop thinking about a dead guy long enough to return my feelings. You're a tease who doesn't have any feelings, any heart." She reached out to grab my arm but I was still in character. I yanked my arm away, leaving her with only empty air. "Don't touch me!" I said, pretending to sound outraged. "If you cant return my feelings, don't even try to pretend. You should be **ashamed **of yourself for leading me on and playing with my feelings like that. I've never felt so betrayed or embarrassed in my **entire life**."

"Adrian!" She cried, her tears pouring freely now. "**Please **forgive me," she hiccupped. "You're right, you're so incredibly right; you're always right. I'm such a terrible monster." She pulled the blanket up to her face and covered her face with it; audible sobs came from her chest where she was crying.

"Oh Rose," I said, holding my hand out to stroke her hair. "I didn't mean any of that. You wanted me to be mad at you… I didn't think you'd take me seriously. I meant what I said earlier; I love you. I love everything about you. I can understand your feelings for Dimitri and I've gotten over the fact that I can never take him out of your heart completely. But you can't hold yourself accountable for any pain I have. **Please**; you know I don't like how you are still in love with Dimitri, but its not like I can do anything about it… so I've chosen to forget about it entirely. You need me; and I need you. I love you Rose; and even though I cant have your entire heart, I feel luckier than any man alive to at least be included in it." I kissed the top of her head and the crying ceased. She pulled down t he covers from her face. "Forgive me?" I asked, holding my hand out.

"Of course," she said smiling, reaching for my hand. We sat in silence, doing nothing but staring at the ceiling until the nurse told me it was time for me to leave. I didn't wanna leave Rose while her emotions were so up and down, but I really didn't have much of a choice. Before I left, I closed the distance between Rose and I and kissed her. I didn't know if I'd be able to visit again tomorrow; I had to practice spirit with Lissa; I was going to miss Rose every minute I was gone.  
I didn't wanna see anyone right now, so instead of going to the lunchroom, I went back to my suite. I still had all of those books I borrowed from the priest that I needed to give back. I figured I could do that in person since I had a lot of questions on the subject anyways. I carried the books in both of my hands and walked down to the church. I wondered if the new priest would be there, or if the old one would have come back… I walked through the large double-door entrance, walking slowly as I tried not to trip under the weight of the books.  
"Adrian Ivashkov, what a pleasant surprise. I was begging to think I'd never get those books back," said a familiar voice from the shadows. The priest I encountered from my last visit was approaching me with the words 'welcome' written all over his face.

"Hey," I said slightly uncomfortable. "I've got your books. Sorry it took so long to return them; I was busy." It was a lame excuse, but I really didn't need to give an excuse to begin with, so I wasn't so worried.

"Yes," he said, still smiling although his eyes looked troubled. "I heard about what happened to your girlfriend. Is she healing?" He asked.

"Uh, yeah," I said. I didn't know how he knew about Rose and I but I still wasn't very worried about it. "She sure is taking her time doing it two," I added bitterly.

"Hey," the priest said disapprovingly. "None of that, you hear. She will be healed in time. But her wounds were severe. I've been praying for her daily." He smiled fondly at the cross at the front of the room. "God works miracles. As a matter of fact, it's a miracle that girl is still alive." His eyes bore into mine, letting me know he knew what I did to save her. I still didn't believe it was a big deal… anyone would've tried to protect someone they loved… even if that meant a Morori had to start a fight with a Strigori… even while Dimitri was screaming threats at me, I didn't once fear for my life. I didn't ever doubt that I would get out of there alive. I didn't stop once to think about what my actions would cost me… I know now that even if I did have those thoughts, they'd be wasted. I'm alive; I'm fine. As a matter of fact, nothing at all happened to me… But I wondered why this man was looking at me so strangely… As if he was a artist looking at a particular stunning painting… As if he was PROUD of me… Weird. "You did what you needed to do, we don't have to talk about it any further." I nodded. "Well," he said, looking anxiously around the church, "if that's all, I really must go."

"Oh, yeah," I said, giving him a confused look. I've never known a person who would willingly leave my presence. It made want to know more about him; like who he was exactly.

"Hey," I called after him before he opened the door. He turned around to face me, his eyes flashing between expectant and impatient.  
"Yes?" He asked me.

"What's your name?" I asked.

"My name is Henry," he said and then he left. A couple minutes later, the priest I recognized was coming in through the front doors.  
"Oh," he said enthusiastically. "Lord Ivashkov," he said, opening his arm wide in greeting, a smile broad on his face. "What brings you here so late at night?" He asked, looking around the church to see if I was alone. I didn't know why, but that simple move seemed really significant.

"Uh," I said. I didn't know why I was so hesitant to bring Henry up… "I was just checking the place out," I lied smoothly. "You know, in case I wanted to look for a church to attend… I've been feeling a pull toward religion lately. What did you say this place was again?"

"Catholic," he answered, her smile growing. I knew that he was thinking of all the recognition his church would get if Adrian Ivashkov showed up.

"Yeah, that's what I thought," I said, looking around the church one last time. "Anyways, its getting late and I'm kind of tired," I said, inclining my head towards the door. "So I think I'm gonna head out of here."  
"So soon? But you only just got here," said the priest, looking putout.

"Well," I said uncomfortably. Not many people contradicted me. "I need some sleep."

"Yes, your right," he said slowly. "I hope you come and visit again tomorrow."

"Yeah, sure thing," I said, stepping towards the door. I turned around and, before he could say anything, I left the church, closing the door behind me. It was weird that I would feel adrenaline pouring into my veins. Somewhere inside me was screaming for me to run… but my body was frozen from shock. As much as I wanted to move, my legs wouldn't take me forwards. I'd never been this scared in my entire life, and I didn't even know what I was frightened of… Something about the church felt strange and uninviting. I felt uncomfortable, and I felt alone. I was also confused… Why was I so afraid? It was creepy… very creepy.

**Lissa's P.O.V**

The library. The lunchroom. Class. My Dorm… It felt like my life was being put into some weird anti-social pattern. I haven't been talking to many other royals lately, its just been me, Christian, Adrian and Eddie. Occasionally I would run into another student who wanted to say hello and, trying to be polite, I would speak with them… but I wasn't really holding my own in any conversations lately. I was worried about Rose mostly anyways. She had only been back to the academy for less than a day when something happened to put her in the nurses office. Adrian said she was okay, but I still didn't know how long it would take her to heal… I also wondered how long she's stay at the academy when she **was **finished healing. When she first got back, she told me she couldn't stay long, but I dismissed that thought. I figured I could probably do or say something to make her stay. But her time her has already stretched out much longer than she planned, so she wouldn't be around much longer after she was better. Time was running out and I didn't know what I could do to make Rose stay. I considered putting myself into danger, so that she'd be to worried to leave me here alone. But that would be a terrible thing to do. I didn't want Rose to have to risk her life to save me, and I didn't want to have Rose be mad at me for making such a stupid move. Plus, I didn't think I could do very well in any near-death situations. Christian wont help me think of any ideas. _"It's her decision," _he would say. "_If Rose wants to leave, there's really nothing you can do to stop her. She's gonna do what she needs to, she's gonna do what right for her."_ I had argued, pleaded, and begged, but he refused to have any part in this… He didn't want to force Rose to stay.  
Neither did I though. I didn't want to **force **Rose to stay… I just wanted to give her a reason not to leave. I sighed, giving up on eating my blueberry bagel and got up to leave. Christian followed me to the library. I expected to see Eddie there, but I was surprised to find both Eddie and Adrian there, sitting on opposite ends of the table.

"Are you gonna make a habit at getting up this early?" I asked, smiling. He returned my smile, but it looked more like a grimace.

"Sit down," said Eddie. "There's something you guys need to know."

**A/N: Hey guys! I have an idea. I need a new character. So…. I have a kind of contest like thing. The first person to review this chapter can have a spot In my story :D lol . make sure to sign your name at the end of review & you could be in my story. Yay! Thank you for reading my chapter. Review it & let me know what you think. P.S- I'm sorry, the chapter wasn't as long as I originally wanted it to be, but I didn't have any sleep last night, so I decided to cut it short. **

**With much love,**

**Stephanie  
**


	8. Without You I'll be Miserable at Best

Chapter Eight

_Gonna make you wanna feel like you are falling in love  
get to the point of what you're trying to say  
gonna make you wanna feel like you are falling in love  
break down, break down_

_-Winters Halo_

A/N: Hey guys. Well, I've decided to borrow to of you, lol. Congratulations to Faint-of-hart and Reader-Rabit93 who are now added to my story. I hope neither of you are upset with how I used your characters… If you are, tell me and we can work something out.

For the rest of my readers, I hope you enjoy this story and REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW.

Adrian's P.O.V

Lissa's face immediately dropped. "What did I miss?" She asked, glancing from Eddie to me, waiting for either of us to answer. I stared at the ground, feeling strangely empty. "What's going on?" She asked more urgently. When neither of us spoke, she rose her voice. "If neither of you say something I swear to-"

"Rose left," Eddie said pathetically. "She's gone."  
"What?" Lissa asked, sitting down. Her eyes searched Eddie's face, willing to find something that contradicted him. "What do you mean she's… gone?" She asked, her voice breaking on the last word.

"She left the academy this morning," I answered.

"Without a goodbye?" Lissa asked. "Rose would never leave without telling me goodbye."  
"She tried to last time, remember?" Eddie said. His voice was devastated.

"Oh yeah," Lissa said, sounding like she'd rather forget about the last time Rose left the academy. She sighed. "I cant believe she would do that to us… Why was she in such a hurry to leave?" She paused, he mouth forming a large 'o.' "Wait, Adrian… Did she tell you goodbye?"

"No," I said, realizing how dead my voice sounded. "She didn't tell me anything."  
"Well… Where is she? How did you know she was gone?" Lissa asked, not letting anyone have a chance at changing the subject.

"Lissa," Christian said soothingly. "We really don't know anything more than you do at this point. Adrian went to the nurses office to visit Rose and the nurse said she disappeared while everyone else was sleeping."

"Well…" Lissa said, searching for something to argue about; wanting to point her finger to blame someone. She sighed. "I guess this is it, isn't it?" Lissa said quietly. There wasn't any anger or attitude in her voice as she spoke. She sounded smalls and fragile. Immediately, my face softened and I wondered what was wrong with her.  
"What is it Lissa?" Christian asked, putting his arm around her in an attempt to comfort her. "What's the matter, baby?"

"Rose keeps running away from us every chance she gets," Lissa said, wiping her eyes on the back of her hands. "Why does she keep leaving without saying goodbye? Doesn't she love us? Aren't we her friends?" She asked. Tears threatened to spill from my eyes, but I ignored them. I wouldn't cry, especially in front of all of these witnesses. I needed to stay tough, but I couldn't understand it either. While I was with Rose, I felt so happy. I loved her, and she said she felt the same way about me, too. But if that were true, then why would she leave at every chance she could get? And why would she leave without telling me goodbye?

"Lissa," Eddie said. "I'm sorry. I wish there was something I could do."

"There is," Lissa said, turning to face him. I could see her aura and in that moment, she felt hopeful. "Your strong, Eddie." She said. "Your smart, and your brave. You could bring Rose back." She said, touching his arm. "You could bring Rose back for me."  
Eddie looked as though he wished he had never spoken. Lissa was right, Eddie was smart, strong and very brave. Out of all of us, he had the biggest chance of bringing Rose back to us. I suddenly felt hopeful.  
"Please Eddie," Lissa said.  
"But I'm suppose to be your guardian," he said slowly, looking for a way around this. "How am I suppose to do that when I'm away from school for god only knows how long? I may not be able to graduate."

"Eddie, please. Rose could die," Lissa said, tears falling freely from her eyes.  
"She probably will die," I said. "She left before she was finished with her treatment." I elaborated as I saw the horrified look on Lissa's face. "If she doesn't get her medication, and she's still hurt, that will more than likely hurt her chances at taking Dimitri on."  
"Oh My God," Lissa said, tears sliding silently down her face. "Eddie… Please?" She asked, turning her face towards Eddie once more. "You're the only one who can help her. If I could, I would. Trust me." Eddie looked up, torn between staying and leaving.  
"Give me a day or two please," Eddie said, his eyes begging for us to understand. "I need to think this through." Lissa nodded, knowing that this is where we would have to leave this. I was a little frustrated, but I could understand Eddie's hesitation. He needed to think about his self at the moment, and running after Rose would be endangering his life as well. I understood. Eddie put his face in his hands, and a few minutes later, he left. Lissa was still standing in the same place, to zoned out to move. I realized that that was it for a conversation, so I took my leave as well. My head was spinning from all that my mind had had to go through the last few days. I had gone from hopeful, to blissful, to depressed in the whole time Rose had been here. I never really questioned that Rose would come out of this alive. I always knew she'd make it… but now I wasn't so sure. After seeing how easily Dimitri threw her down while she was in full heath, I didn't wanna think about what he could do to her while she was already as weak as she was. It would be to his advantage. I just hoped Dimitri had enough morals not to murder his sick ex-girlfriend. Ah, this was all so complicated. Scenarios formed in my head between Rose and Dimitri and frankly, none of the outcomes were good. Pain I'd never had to endure before washed over me until my entire body was shaking. Every part of me was empty. My mind was overloading and I felt like I was going to shut down. Everything around me was spinning and I knew it wasn't because of a lack of substances. Every part of me was in pain. Pain like I'd never experienced. I wanted it to go away; would do anything for it to leave. It became hard to swallow; I thought I was gonna choke. Nothing in the room was staying still, and I was getting motion sickness. Why wouldn't it go away? I was relatively aware that I was lacking oxygen, but my mouth wouldn't open to bring any in. I was gonna die, and all I could think about was Rose… I reached my hand into my pocket and pulled out a diamond ring. I threw it to the floor… realizing that now; I had no use for it.

Okay, so my breakdown only lasted about forty seconds, but it felt like a lifetime. After seeing the ring on the floor, I gasped. Air flooded through my throat and the rest of my body was thanking it. I stared at the 18-karat diamond ring. (A/N: Pictures are on my profile) It was simple, but when I bought it, there wasn't a doubt in my mind that it was the _right _one. Rose would appreciate its quality, while I appreciate it's price. It was $9,999 well spent. I thought we could spend a lifetime together, but as reality hit me, she was a guardian. A lifetime to them would be lucky to reach 50. And to make matters worse, she was a weak guardian, hunting down her Strigori ex-boyfriend. Every moment she was away from me, I would only continue to have anxiety attacks. I didn't wanna live my life like that. I sighed, put the ring back in the box, set the box on my desk, and left my room. I needed to find something to do before I went insane.

I didn't know were else to go, so I headed down to the church. As I pulled the door open, someone else was trying to walk out at the same time. I was already on the ground before I saw a girl standing a couple feet above me. Reaching her hand out to me to help me up, and stuttering multiple apologizes. As I stood up, I got a good look at her. Her hair was slightly auburn, and her eyes were a threatening shade of jade. She wore a plaid mini-skirt, a white see-through blouse and a sleek black tube top over it. I looked down at her feet, where she wore black stilettos.(Authors note: Pictures are at the bottom of my profile) She was gorgeous, obviously. I noticed she was talking, so I tried to pay attention the words coming out of her mouth.

"Oh my gosh!" She said, her cheeks blushing fiercely. "I am so sorry! I didn't see you there. I am such a klutz!"  
"Oh, its okay," I smiled kindly at her. "What did you say your name was?" I asked, trying to remember if she mentioned it already.

"Oh, I'm sorry. My name's Sydney; I'm kinda new here. What about you?" She asked.

"Adrian Ivashkov," I said. Her eyes widened in recognition and her cheeks grew a brighter shade of pink.

"Oh," she said, her voice cracking. "I Uh… didn't know that." I laughed.

"Hey! Don't you go making judgments already," I warned her lightly. "I'm nothing like people think I am." She smiled, but she was obviously still embarrassed.

"Yeah, I'm sorry," she said again. I almost laughed. This girl sure did sorry a lot.  
"So what were you doing in the church?" I asked in an attempt to change the subject.

"Um, I was just getting my schedule. What about you?" She asked. Her eyes swept from my head to my toes in a checking-out sort of way. Wow, this girl was brave… didn't she know my reputation?

"Just got bored… there's nothing else to do at this hour." I said, pointing at the sunset.

"About that…" she said," we should probably head inside, don't you think?"  
"Yeah, I guess your right." I said. She walked past me a little, but she was walking slowly, giving me the chance to follow her.  
"So…" she said slowly as I trailed up beside her. "What is there to do at this hour?" Was it just me, or was her voice sounding slightly suggestive.

"Well, I could think of a few things," I said seductively. She laughed nervously, catching the hint.  
"I didn't quiet mean that," she said. "Could you show me the way to the cafeteria?" I guess I had imagined that… weird.

"Yeah, sure," I said, resuming the spot ahead of her. I took her wrist and towed her towards the main building. We walked the rest of the way there, having an occasional conversation here and there but nothing to permanent. When we got to the cafeteria, I turned around. "Well," I said, "here it is." I smiled at her, doing my best to look supporting. "I hope you have a good time here. St. Vlad's is really a great place." I let go of her wrist and she in turn grabbed mine.  
"Thank you," she said. She let go of my wrist and walked passed me towards the rest of the teachers. I was momentarily stunned. Most people shy away from me instinctively, so that moment of intimacy caught me off guard. It wasn't like we'd kissed or anything, but the blood under my skin was burning. As soon as I regain self control, I walked out of the building, feeling very stunned. I didn't quiet know this Sydney girl yet… but now I really wanted to.

Lissa's P.O.V

Adrian left the library soon after Eddie did. My feet were still stuck to the floor, so moving wasn't something I had the slightest intention of doing at the moment. Christian was staring at me, but I couldn't meet his gaze. I was in such a good mood before I got in the library, who knew everything would flip so dramatically before I'd even leave it.

"Lissa," Christian asked in a soothing voice. "Are you okay?" I sat in his lap and wept. Adrian's words kept replaying in my head; _She probably will die._ I couldn't think about it, but my brain refused to switch the subject. I would have to deal with this pain now, the pain of loosing Rose. Outside of the library, I had a clear view of the church. I nuzzled my head over Christian's shoulder, happy for the distraction. However, the scene that greeted me out there was anything but lightening my mood. Adrian was out there… with a girl. He was laughing, and so was she. Anger shot threw me. I thought that he would be able to understand my pain, but not even an hour after she was gone, he was ready to hook up with another skank. I started to shake. Christian misread my anger for pain and rubbed my back. "Shh…" He said. "Everything's going to be okay, I promise."

"Adrian…" I said through my teeth. This time, there was no mistaking my anger, he turned to look at the view behind us and I could hear a audible hiss come from his mouth.

"What a jerk," he said. I could guess he was thinking the same things I was. I saw Adrian grab the girls' hand and walk off towards the main building. Irrationally, I jumped to my feet. "Where are you going?" He asked, looking at me.

"Someone needs to set that boy straight," I said angrily. "Before I break his teeth out." I stormed out of the library, a stream of profanities sliding so well off of my tongue.

Christian followed behind me, not succeeding in trailing beside me. He was trying to calm me down before I caused a scene with Adrian. He was angry to, but he was afraid I would loose control, and regret it later. I could feel the dark magic in me bubbling, begging to get out. I could delay it, but sooner or later it would win. I only hoped Adrian's face was recognizable when I was finished with him.

"Lissa," Christian cried, grabbing my arm. I swung at him, hitting him in the face so hard that he lost his balance and fell to the floor. Almost immediately, the darkness subsided and guilt and worry took its place.  
"Oh Christian," I said, falling to my knees beside him. "Oh my gosh, I am so sorry." He was withering on the floor, grabbing his face in both hands. I tried to pull his hands away to see how much damage I caused, but his hands were glued to his face as he refused to let me see. "Oh Christian," I said. I laid my face on his stomach and wept. "I am so so sorry." I was out of control if I'd hit the most important person in my life. And I was down right messed up if I would hurt him to this extent. Christian heard the sound of my tears and looked up. His face was bloody, and his nose was definitely broken. Instead of cheering me up like he hoped, it only made me feel worse.

"Lissa…" he said, chocking back blood. "Don't be sad. It was an accident. I'm not mad at you. Look," he said, grabbing my hand and forcing me to touch his face. "It doesn't even hurt much. I've had worse."

"That's not what I want to hear," I cried, my voice sounding strangled. "I don't wanna hear that you've had worse. Christian, I don't know what's wrong with me? Why am I the only one who's magic drives them crazy? Why cant I just have air or water or fire? Like any _normal _person? Why do I have to be so different than everyone else?"  
"Your special," he said, rubbing my back. "And I'm sure you weren't wishing for air, or water or fire when you saved Rose. If you weren't a spirit user, there would be a lot more wounded or dead people. Your powers come in handy once in awhile," he said, jokingly. "If it means that every once in a while you lash out on the closest person well… I think it's a good trade." He put his arm around my shoulders in an attempt to make me feel better. It worked. My tears subsided and I wiped my eyes on his shirt.

"I'm sorry Christian," I said again. "You deserve so much more than me, but I'm to selfish to let you go."  
"No honey," he contradicted. "You deserve much more than me. Remember, I'm bound to go Strigori soon." I laughed.

"No, you wont. I just wish people could see how utterly amazing you are," He smiled and kissed me lightly on the cheek.  
"I think I'm going to need to go to the nurse now," he laughed. "What's our story?"  
"Your crazy, psychotic girlfriend hit you over the head with a salami because you wouldn't give her a potato chip," I laughed.

"Nah," he said, barely containing laughter of his own. "I was thinking I bumped into the wall while I was running to get to my next class."  
"Ah," I said, faking disappointment. "I'm sure my story is far more interesting."  
"Yeah, it is," he agreed. "But my story wont get you expelled from school."  
"If you insist," I laughed. I grabbed his hand and helped him up. We walked the rest of the way to the nurses office in silence. I still felt terrible about the incident with Christian, and I was still angry about Adrian's new crush. My emotions were on haywire and I didn't know what was right and what was wrong. I had never been so confused in my entire life. I wondered how many more times my outbursts would happen. I wondered if I would frequently loose control or if it would only be rare. I prayed that it would be rare, and that Christian wouldn't be around to witness or suffer first hand from my next one. This whole situation was seriously screwed up.

We opened the door to the nurses office and without asking questions, the nurse disappeared into the back room. She came back with a brown bottle and took Christians arm and lead him to the back room. I sat in the waiting chair while Christian was looked over. I could hear sounds of a X-ray being powered up, assumingly to check how broken Christians nose was. Not long after Christian left, a new girl came in. She was dressed in a long sleeve button up shirt, black skinny jeans and black Chanel wedges. It was simply chic. She had long black hair that fell a down the middle of her back and gorgeous butterscotch eyes. She stood at about 5'8 with the help of her two-inch heels.  
"Hello," she said politely, "My names Diandra and I'm new here. Could you tell me where the office is?" She looked around the room as she spoke, trying to figure out were she was.

"Uh, yeah," I said. I stood up and walked behind the nurses desk. I pulled out a map of the school from the second drawer, and grabbed a red pen from the top of the desk. I waved Diandra over to give her the directions. "Right now, were in the nurses office," I said while drawing an 'X' through our current location. "Your gonna need to leave here, take a left and follow the sidewalk until you see a sign that says 'Students aren't allowed,' that's the teachers lounge," I said. I drew on the map the way she was suppose to go while I spoke. "Take a right, in the opposite direction to the teachers lounge, follow it to until you see a red building on the right. Turn there. When you reach the red building, go inside and that's the main building. There's gonna be a stair case in front of you, ignore it and walk in through the left. Then there will be a white door with the words 'office' painted clearly on there. Walk inside and your there," I smiled at her politely and handed her the map. "I hope you enjoy your stay here at St. Vladimir's Academy. It's a really wonderful school." I looked at her again, trying to see where she'd belong. She looked tough, but she was thin. She must've been a Dhampir. She left without saying anything and I sat back down waiting for Christian to come back out.

When he did come back out, the blood was gone from his face but his nose was still crooked. I looked down at the floor. "Hey," he said brightly. "Lets go grab something to eat." I nodded, putting on my fakest smile and left with him.

Author's note: Hey guys. I am so sorry for the delay in getting this chapter up, but I've been suffering from major writers block. I've also been trying to get ready for school (which we start this Monday- August 17) Wonderful, huh? Anyways. I hoped you enjoyed this chapter enough to review. And again, I apologize for how late I got this out.

With much love,

Stephanie.


	9. Envious

"_Why are you looking for love?_

_Why are you still searching as if I'm not enough?_

_To where will you go child?_

_Tell me where will you run?_

_To where will you run?_

_-Tenth North Avenue._

Chapter Nine Rose's P.O.V:

I'm an idiot. That explains it. I am a stubborn, self centered, heartless coward. Everything in my life was finally falling back into place and I could see a routine following. Adrian and I were hitting it off and I really do think that there's something special between us. I needed to talk to him. I hope he tries to talk to me tonight in my dreams. I need to apologize for leaving on such short notice, especially without a goodbye.

My chest felt empty and deprived of any emotion. I didn't know were I needed to go, or how long it would take me to reach my destination. I just hoped that, if I die, I could take Dimitri down with me. That was my final wish. For now, however, I wished that Adrian would be happy. I wished he hadn't fallen in love with me, and that I hadn't fallen for him. I wish our relationship was much easier, so that I didn't feel this guilt for leaving him. I wish nothing had to change. I wondered for a few minutes what would happen if Dimitri _hadn't _been changed. Would I still love him, unconditionally and irrevocably… would I stay with him forever? And if I had realized my love for Adrian while I was still with Dimitri, before he was changed… would things be different? I laid down, resting my head on my pillow, and thought over these things. I hadn't realized I fell asleep until I felt the familiar pull towards the beach. This time however, things were different. I was wearing a pair of shorts and a tank top but the outfit seemed more… conservative than any of my previous visits with Adrian. I searched frantically up and down the shore for a sign of Adrian, but I couldn't see him anywhere. I found that fairly odd, so I decided to check the beach house that had always been in the background of my dreams, but we'd never actually been inside. As I approached the screen door, I heard voices coming from inside of the house. I recognized one to be Adrian's voice, however the other voice was unfamiliar to me. It was a girl, I could tell that much. I couldn't make out their conversation, so I tried leaning my head in closer to the door.

Nothing happened. I opened the door wider, and the creaking from the old door was barely audible. I crawled on the floor behind a large leather sofa. I didn't know why, but I was feeling strangely suspicious. I pulled my head just barely above the tip of the coach to get a better view of the room, and my options. The voices sounded like they were coming from the left, so my best bet was to take the left door… simple right? But what if there were _just _outside of those doors? They would see me if I tried to sneak in. I held my breath, and took a risk… I entered through the right door. I found myself in the middle of a beautifully decorated kitchen. I didn't waste to much time admiring it though, I was feeling strangely anxious, and I needed to get out of there. Taking the immediate right turn, I found myself in a hallway. The door on the right, where all the voices were, was slightly cracked, so I could finally heard the conversation that was taking place inside.  
"Adrian, you know what I'm talking about," said the girl.

"Damn!" Adrian cried, "What is this about?"

"Stop acting stupid Adrian!" The girl shouted. "You know full well what this is about." I felt my forehead crease as I struggled to understand what they were talking about.  
"Kyla…" Adrian pleased. "This can't happen this way."  
'_What can't happen this way?' _I wanted to shout. I was starting to get very irritated, and I didn't know how to release my anger without letting my presence be known. Something told me that this wasn't a conversation I was suppose to overhear. "How did this happen?" Adrian asked, his voice defeated.

"Well… you knew it would happen, didn't you? She left before her treatment was finished." She answered sadly. _Treatment? Were they talking about me?_

"I still can't believe this. I mean… I always knew something out there could break Rose I mean, no one's invincible but… I just didn't expect it to be herself," Adrian said. I sat in the doorway, stunned. What were they talking about? I needed to get up. The advisable thing to do would be to leave, but I knew that if I got on my feet, I'd be more likely to walk into the room in front of me, demanding answers.

"Well, your gonna have to believe it because its reality… kinda. I mean, we're speaking in your dreams, but Rose's death _really_ did happen."  
_Rose's death?_

I wanted to scream. All the memories from the day before flooded back to me, leaving me gasping breathlessly on the stone hard floor.

*******************************************

"Rose?" The nurse said, coming in for my daily shot. I didn't really mind shots, it just irritated me a little bit. Of course, if you were having vampire venom shot into your arm, I'm sure you'd be a little uncomfortable to. I stuck out my arm, as our usual routine.  
"So…" I said, "When do you think I can get outta this place?"

She laughed. "Rose, you ask that every time I come in here." This was true, but I've been here for almost a week and a half yet without any sign of immediate release.  
"Well… you've never given me a straight answer," I pushed.

"I don't know when you'll be getting out. But you can be sure that it wont be before your healthy." She smiled at me and pointed at the charts she had in her hands. My heart was still beating about thirty to forty times less that the average persons, my blood hasn't been completely restored yet, and I seemed to be suffering from a minor concussion. All of these things seemed insignificant to me. I should be able to leave, and I was irritated with them for making me stay.  
"Whatever," I said sourly, my good mood evaporating. I hoped Adrian would come and visit me today; I needed something to look forward to. "Its not like I really have any choice in this, do I?" I asked sarcastically.

"No Ma'am, you do not," she smiled, ignoring the bitter edge to my voice. The nurse wasn't someone you could easily make unconfident. She was one of the best, and St. Vlad's was luck to have her. I bet she'd dealt with many whiney kinds who wanted to leave just about as bad as I do. I do, however, doubt she's ever had any student come into her office to recover from a fight she had between her strigori ex-boyfriend slash ex-mentor. I laughed at that; yeah, that was highly unlikely.

"I'm hungry," I complained. She nodded her head, smiled, and left the office to find me something to eat. I took my the only chance I presumed I'd have for the rest of the day… Acting on impulse, I jumped out of the hospital bed, yanked all the cords off of my body and ran as fast and as far as I could away from the nurses office.

I didn't know where I was going to go, all I knew was that I had to get out of here. I had been at the academy far longer than I had normally planned, and I needed to get back on track as far as hunting Dimitri was going. I was already getting closer towards the edges of the academy's property only a few minutes after leaving the nurses office. I slowed my pace, as to not make the guards suspicious. I walked towards the large gates, and looked up towards the guardians on duty. I was dressed casually; I wasn't put into a hospital gown, because I was being treated at the nurses' office.  
"Hello Miss Hathaway," said the guardian on duty. "What can I help you with today?"

"I'm leaving," I said simply.

"Did the officials say that was okay?" He asked, looking at me with suspicious eyes.

"I'm eighteen years old," I reminded him. "I don't need the officials permission to leave the school. I'm in charge of myself."

"Yes, I understand that," the guardian said. His face turned sympathetic. "But I think you need more time to heal."  
"I am perfectly fine!" I said, more urgently than needed.

"As long as your sure," the guardian said, standing to the side. He pressed a button of his control panel that lifted the gates about six feet up, more than enough room to let me through. They must've upped the security around here since the break out we made to Spokane.

I left the campus without looking back. I didn't want to think about anything I was leaving behind. My future, was at risk… My relationship with Adrian was at risked…. _Adrian. _I don't think I've ever felt to emotionally tied to him before. I didn't understand why it was so hard for me to leave him… Maybe, somewhere inside of me knew I wasn't going to be coming back? Maybe I wasn't coming back.

I couldn't dwell on this possibility for to long, I needed to focus on the problem at hand, and obsessing over love and relationships was not the way to go about doing things.

My head felt like it was about to burst open, and I took that as proof that I was finally outside of the academy's property. I got this far, and there was no way I was turning back now. My feet were aching from the speed at which I ran, and my mind was racing.

Adrian would be so mad at me; Lissa would feel betrayed; Christian, who had finally revealed how much he cared for me, would be upset with me; Eddie would be devastated; they would never forgive me.

I was running at full speed, but with all the progress I'd been making, I could've easily been standing still. The trees around me showed no sympathy to my exposed arms and feet, and I couldn't see any sign of a break in the woods.

Hours must've passed, but the felt only like minutes. I ran for only one purpose, I needed to get out. I needed to find Dimitri. _When would these trees end?_ I didn't know where I was going, or how I would get there… These things I would figure out later.

Dark shadows surrounded me… watching my every moving. Some hid behind the trees, but some were less conspicuous; standing in full sight, freely staring at me.

"Mason!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. "Mason!" Moments later, the faint figure of Mason appeared in front of me, his sad eyes staring intently on my face. He was becoming less clear to me lately… I wondered if that meant he was almost ready to pass on. Part of me was excited for him; he would no longer be eternally damned to this place. The other part, however, felt empty at the thought that I would no longer have the option to call for him; to see him this last time though, that would be enough.

"You look well," I smiled. "Are you almost ready to pass on?" I asked, voicing my hypothesis. He smiled and nodded, for one the sadness left his eyes. "That's wonderful." I said encouragingly. He turned his back to me and stared out in the distance. He could obviously see something invisible to me, because he turned to me quickly, fear evidence in his eyes. "What is it?" I asked. He pointed one long figure to the horizon. The sun was setting. I could barely see the surface of the sun, and the thought frightened me. I was ready to be caught yet. I needed to find somewhere to hide. "Mason! Do you know how to get out of here? Can you lead me to some place safe?" I asked, more urgently than I intended. I had no fear of dying, but I couldn't die yet. I still had a mission to fulfill. He nodded his head and, with exaggerated slowness, he lead me west of the way we were starting to go. I held my breath and followed him. As the minutes passed, he picked up his pace until we got to the point that I had to run to keep up with him. Ghosts could obviously fly much more quickly and swiftly than we could walk.

We didn't stop until we reached an abandoned road. There were trees surrounding both sides of the road. We walked down the road, and I chanced a glance at the sun. I estimated that we only had a little under twenty minutes until the sun was completely set, and it would be safe for the Strigori to come out. I wondered nervously how long it would take us to get to wherever Mason was leading us.

"Why did you leave, Rose?" He asked me. I was surprised; for the most part, the ghosts didn't talk. It looked like it caused them very much pain to produce any kind of noise. However, the words escaping Masons lips seemed to have no effect on his physical well-being. But his face showed intense emotional pain. "You were safe there."

"I am the only one who can defeat Dimitri," I said, wishing for him to understand. "My safety is not important. I will forfeit my life if that is what it takes to kill him." The tone of my voice was sharp; I was sure of myself. I was fooling myself into believe that I would walk into Dimitri's layer, chopping his head off, leaving without a scratch and living the rest of my life in a romantic fairytale. I knew the odds were against me, but if anything, I had to at least _try_.

There was a barn at the end of the road. It was exactly how you would picture a barn: red, and with tons of hay scattered all over the place. It was large, and very homely. Mason lead me to the long, white gates and then turned his back towards the barn, staring at me.

"I can't help you from here on. Only the living can enter here." He leaned his face towards mine, cupping his hands under my chin. He kissed my forehead. "I hope you don't die, Rose." And at that note, he disappeared. I blinked, let out an audible sigh, and crossed over the white fence. My headache immediately went away. I looked up at the sky, and gave a sigh in relief. The sun was almost completely below the horizon now, and I had a safe spot to spend the night at. I would live, if not only just for an extra day.

I woke up to the sound of birds whistling in the dark. I rubbed my face and yawned. The sky was still dark, but there were hints of the sun attempting to rise above the sky. I estimated the time to be around five-thirty. I searched the barn for something to eat, but all I found was a cabinet with a hundred different flavors of Ramen noodles. I groaned, I'd always distasted for Ramen. I couldn't find any pans or any source of water to cook the Ramen in, so I opened the package and ate it raw. It reminded me of rice cake, however it tasted nothing like it. That's odd.

Anyways, after finishing my meal, I waited anxiously until the sun rose; It was sometime after nine before it was safe to leave the perimeters of the barn. Quickly and quietly, I took a chance, and jumped over the gates surrounding the barn. I felt large pressure building up against my head, and the dark shadows were following me once more. Mason never told me where to go when I woke up this morning, and I didn't want to call him again. Therefore, I sucked in a deep breath and took a guess. I, regrettably, decided to explore the woods opposite of what I had been traveling through last night.  
Any normal person would stay on a path, which I never understood. The path; the road, they all seem "welcome" to us, but the woods and the trees provide you more cover. There is no denying that, if you are cautious, the woods are a safer option to take.

I didn't know where they would take me, but I prayed it wouldn't be in the wrong direction.

The sky was bright, but as soon as I walked into the woods, I was overwhelmed by darkness. My eyes took several minutes to adjust, and even then, I couldn't really see clearly.

Sign one, right? Most people avoid areas with very little light, especially when there is another option with the sun glaring down at you, painting the road, and guiding the way for you. I heard the sound of wolves howling in the distance, and my knees buckled.

Sign two, right? When you start hearing noises, and yet, you cant see anything? Any normal person would get out of there. Any normal person would take this chance and leave. But I stood my ground.

I am a Dhampir, aren't I?

So what on earth could possibly hurt me?

I guess we were just about to find out…

"Rose!" A voice yelled, shaking me violently, trying to snap me back into reality. I opened my eyes, and I looked into the face of the most beautiful angel…

Adrian had come to rescue me.

But I was wrong. We were back in the house, and Adrian was bent over me, looking at me with an astonished look on his face.  
"Your… alive?" He asked.

"I don't know," I answered simply. Was I dead? Or was I alive? Maybe I was merely sleeping, which was why I would show up in Adrian's dream. But still, I couldn't remember how it ended.

Why do they think I died?  
I struggled to redeemer what happened after Adrian drug me out of my trance. Was there something in the woods with me? Was there strigori? Or did some ignorant animal kill me? I was confused, and my body ached all around.

But something Adrian had said earlier stirred in my brain, without any intention to leave.

"_I always knew something out there could break Rose I mean, no one's invincible but… I just didn't expect it to be herself."_ What had he meant by that?

**A/N: I apologize for the major delay in getting this chapter out. We've been in school for about two months now, and I still haven't really gotten back into the schedule of writing, ya know.? (: Anyways,, I'm trying to get better at putting up chapters, and although none will (hopefully) be as delayed as this one, I cant promise to get one out as often as I could over the summer. Be patient && I promise I'll make it worth the wait(:**


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